Behind His Smile
by StoneColdAngel
Summary: They saw his smile and heard his laughter.what they failed to see was the pain,they failed to hear his sobs everytime he cried himself to sleep.no one noticed he was hurting.no one noticed he was dying inside.will someone be able to save him in time?
1. Chapter 1

A huge grin was on Harry's face as he walked to the astronomy tower. Today was his one-year anniversary with Draco. Harry couldn't help but feel happy. _I can't believe that Draco and me have been going out for a year now._

He and Draco got together sometime during Christmas break of their sixth year. But not too many people know. Only Harry's friends, Ron and Hermione, knew. Along with Draco's friend, Blaise Zabini. They decided not to tell other people. Harry thought it would be bad for the both of them if people knew, especially since a lot of reporters have been trying to get stories about him. _They'd have a field day if they found out that Harry Potter was gay._

Harry smiled as he opened the door. Looking in, he saw Draco facing him.

"Hey," Harry walked closer to Draco and noticed that he seemed angry. Harry slowed down a little, "What's wrong?"

"Harry," Draco let out a sigh and turned away before facing Harry again. "I think we should break up."

"What?" Harry was shocked. Time seemed to stop moving.

"I don't think I can stay in this relationship anymore."

"But, why?" Harry tried to keep his voice from shaking as tears started to form in his eyes. He tried to blink the tears away. He didn't want to cry in front of Draco.

"I just…don't think I can be in this anymore. It's too much. And I hate that I can't tell everyone that you're my boyfriend. I'm tired of having to hide this."

Tears started to fall from Harry's green eyes. He couldn't say anything. The tears just kept falling.

"Harry, I'm really sorry. I really do love you. I just can't take this anymore."

"Liar," Harry said in such a quiet voice that Draco almost didn't hear him.

"What?" Draco looked at Harry, eyes starting to glisten over with tears.

"I said 'Liar'," Harry repeated in a louder voice. "You're a liar Malfoy."

"What? Harry, what are you talking about?" Draco was confused. But he was also trying to stop tears from falling from his eyes. Seeing the pain in Harry's eyes made it hard for him not to cry. "Harry, I told you that I'm always going to love you. And I meant it. I love you."

"No you don't!" Harry was crying so much that he had to lean against the wall for support. He didn't think his legs would hold him up.

"Yes, I do. After all we've been through, what makes you think I don't love you?"

"No," Harry shook his head, "you don't love me."

"Harry, please, just listen to me."

"No," Harry turned away from Draco and headed for the door. "I'm going now. By Malfoy. Thanks for everything."

"Harry, wait! Don't go. Just, hear me out…please?" Tears were falling down Draco's face.

"Why bother? You said what you had to say. Oh yeah…" Harry stopped and looked back at Draco, tears still falling from his eyes, "Happy Fucken Anniversary. And since I won't get around to saying it, Happy fucking Christmas."

"Harry!" Draco tried to go after him, but Harry slammed the door shut behind him, and was out of sight when Draco finally reached the door.

Author's Note: This story just kind of…came out of nowhere…hehe… so yeah, I hope you guys liked it. Review!


	2. Chapter 2

A week had passed since Draco broke up with Harry. Draco was starting to get worried. He hasn't seen Harry in a week. He doesn't show up to breakfast, lunch, or dinner. Everyday the past week, Draco has been looking for him, hoping that he would walk in with his friends, but he never does.

Draco looked up as he saw a familiar red head walking into the room. He saw Ron walk in by himself, but stop at the door to wait for someone. Draco hoped that Harry was one of the people that Ron was waiting for. But, unfortunately, he wasn't. All that entered was Hermione, and Ron's sister, Ginny. Draco sat up in attention, hoping that one more person would walk through the door, but no one did. The two Weasley's and Granger walked up to their table and sat down. Draco slouched in his seat and started moving his food around his plate with his fork, no longer hungry.

"What's up with you, man?" Blaise asked, noticing his friend's odd behavior.

"What do you mean?" Draco said, looking up from his chicken.

"You broke up with Potter, but everyday this past week, you've been looking around for him, hoping he'll appear."

"What's wrong with that?" Draco looked around the hall once more, hoping that Harry was in there and he just may have missed him somehow.

"I don't know. But seriously, you left him, so why do you care if he shows up to eat or not?"

"I'm just worried about him. I haven't seen him since I told him I wanted to break up. What if something happened to him?"

"I'm sure he's fine. Maybe he just doesn't want to see you so he doesn't eat here."

"You think?" Draco's eyes seemed to brighten up at that thought.

"Maybe," Blaise gave him a questioning look.

"I hope so," Draco said in an almost inaudible voice before going back to his food, his appetite coming back once more.

_Weird. _Blaise thought. Looking over at his friend, he could tell that Draco was hiding something. _I don't think he really wanted to break up with Potter in the first place. But if he didn't…then why did he?_ _I'll talk to him about it later when there isn't that many people around._

---

At the Gryffindor table, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny were discussing Harry's state.

"Are you sure he's okay?" Hermione asked, concern for her best friend evident in her eyes.

"He say's he's fine. He's just not in the mood to eat." Reassured Ron.

"He hasn't been in the mood to eat all week!" exclaimed Ginny.

"Well, I'm not sure about that, but he's probably eating."

"Yeah, Ron's right." Agreed Hermione. "I mean...you've seen him. He looks perfectly fine. He's probably still eating. Just, not with everyone else."

"But, why though?" Asked Ginny.

"I don't know. He's been a little quiet lately. Maybe he just has things on his mind and doesn't want to be around too many people." answered Ron.

"You're probably right…" sighed Ginny. After that, all conversation between the three Gryffindors ceased and they continued with their dinner.


	3. Chapter 3

Draco sat in the front row of his Potions class, waiting for class to start. Class wouldn't start in another ten minutes, so he looked around the class. Not a lot of people were there; it was just him, Blaise,Pansy, Crabbe, Goyle, and Hermione. He was still worried about Harry. He didn't see him at breakfast this morning, but he had a class with him to day. _Hopefully, he'll show up to class and everything will be okay, and I was doing all this worrying for nothing,_ he though.

Hearing the door open, he turned back. He saw Ron at the doorway from where he was sitting, and it looked like he was talking to someone behind him. Draco couldn't see who he was talking to, but something told him it was Harry. Ron walked into the room, and Draco could see the silhouette of the person walking in as well. Draco sat up straight; he couldn't help but stare at the door.

He was right. It was Harry. Draco looked him over to see if anything was wrong with him. But, he looked just fine. He looks a little skinner, and maybe a little paler, but other than that, nothing seemed to be wrong. However, even though he could see that Harry was okay, something in his head was telling Draco that something was up.

Harry walked into the classroom and looked around. His eyes stopped as he spotted Draco, who was looking at him. Their eyes locked for a brief moment before Harry tore his gaze away. Walking to a table as far away from Draco as possible, he sat down and waited for class to start.

When their eyes locked for that one short moment, Draco felt a pang of pain in his heart. He didn't know where it came from. There was something different in Harry's eyes. But before he could figure out what it was, Harry turned away. Draco continued to ponder this until class started.

Blaise had watched Draco when Harry walked in. He saw a mix of emotions in that small amount of time. When Harry walked in, Draco seemed relieved, and almost happy, to see him. Then, he saw shock in his friend's features when his eyes locked with Harry's. Blaise didn't know what caused this shock. But after Harry turned away, there was something different in his friend's eyes. It looked pained and worried, but most of all, it looked hurt.

Blaise turned to look at Harry. Harry was staring at his desk, his head resting in his arms. He looked as if he was lost in thought, but nothing seemed wrong with him. No hurt, but no happiness either. He looked almost…emotionless.

_This is so weird. Draco seems to be more affected by that breakup than Harry. And Draco was the one who broke it off. If Draco broke it off, then why does he seem more hurt by all of this than Harry is? Potter doesn't even look like he has a care in the world, and Draco looks hurt. It was almost as if Potter was the one who broke it off. What the hell is going on?_

So many questions were in Blaise's head. But before he could think about it too much, class had started. Deciding to talk with Draco as soon as he can, he pushed the thoughts to the back of his mind, ignoring them for now.

Harry tried his best to concentrate on the potion he was making, but he couldn't. He had a hard time focusing; his mind kept drifting off. He found his gaze moving towards a certain blond haired boy. But before it could reach Draco, he forced his gaze back to the cauldron in front of him. _Damn it, Harry. Focus! _He tried to tell himself. But no matter how hard he did, he couldn't.

Harry kept finding his thoughts drifting off, thinking about a certain Slytherin. He found himself always thinking about Draco, always remembering everything they did together. His memories of Draco and what they did together wouldn't stop haunting him. The more he tried to forget, the more he remembered.

Harry sighed as he screwed up his potions. Snape sneered at him; a mocking look in his eyes as he gave Harry a failing grade, but Harry didn't care. After he cleaned up the mess he made, class ended. Harry got all of his stuff together and walked out of that class as fast as possible. Hermione and Ron called to him, trying to catch up.

"I'll meet you guys later. I have to do something," he said to them, barely looking at them. Hermione and Ron shared a confused look before giving up trying to catch up with him.

Harry walked into the nearest empty classroom and locked the door behind him, and placed a silencing charm around the room. Leaning against the wall, he let out a frustrated cry. Turning around, he punched the wall as hard as he could. He went continued punching the wall as hard as he could, taking all of his anger and pain out on the wall.

His knuckles started to bleed, but he didn't care. Tears started to form in his eyes, blurring his vision, before falling to the ground. He punched the wall harder, ignoring the pain in his hands. He punched harder and harder, trying his best to get rid of all the pain and hurt inside of him.

His punches started to grow weaker and slower before finally, he collapsed onto the floor. Sob shook his entire body and he cried. Crystalline tears fell from his eyes, down his cheeks, and onto the ground. He didn't try to wipe them away. He just sat there and cried.

He didn't know how long he sat there crying. But by the time the tears stopped, and he finally calmed himself down, he was already thirty minutes late for his next class. Wiping his eyes, he hurried to his next class. Unfortunately, it was another class he had with Draco.

Walking into his next class, he quickly apologized for being so late. He received detention, and had ten points taken away from Gryffindor. But he still didn't care. Taking a seat on the empty chair next to Ron, he tried to pay attention to the class. He still couldn't focus. Ron and Hermione were giving him worried looks and tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't say anything, so they decided to give him some space and ask him about it when he was ready to talk.

Across the room, Draco kept glancing at Harry, not noticing the puzzled looks Blaise kept giving him. He noticed that Harry's eyes were red, as if he was just crying. _What's going on?_ He thought.

Author's note: Another chapter, hope you enjoyed it. Hmm…don't have much to say. Leave a review and tell me what you think.


	4. Chapter 4

"What's up with you?" Blaise asked. There were very few people in the Slytherin common room, and the people that were there were too far away to hear their conversation.

"What do you mean?" asked Draco, a puzzled look gracing his features.

"You've been acting strange all day. And, let me get something straight, it was you who broke up with Potter, right? Not the other way around?"

"Yeah, I broke up with him," there seemed to be a look of sadness in his eyes as Draco said this.

"Then why do you keep staring at Potter and stuff? Man, it looks like Potter was the one who ended it, not you."

"I did end it, but…" Draco trailed off.

"But what?"

"I love him, Blaise. I love Harry Potter." He looked straight into Blaise's eyes as he said this. Blaise could tell he wasn't lying.

"What the hell? Then why did you break up with him?"

"Because…I don't know, man. I really love him and want to be with him, but keeping this relationship a secret, its just hard for me."

"But, I thought you were okay with the secret thing?"

"I was," Draco sighed, "But…I don't know. Sometimes, it was just hard. So many people would flirt with him, and I couldn't do anything to stop them because I wasn't going out with him. And having to act cold around him, just so people wont find out that we're together…it was hard."

You didn't seem to have that hard a time acting cold to him and his friends though," Blaise commented.

"I know. Just a little acting, it wasn't that hard. But then, it would hurt Harry because sometimes I would get too harsh, and I hate that. I hate hurting him."

"I don't get you, man."

"It's complicated. I love him, I really do. But, man, acting like we weren't together…that was so hard for me. We had to sneak around to be together…had to hide from everyone, so we didn't get to spend much time together a lot of the time. I hate that. I hate having to hide the fact that we're together."

"So let me get this straight, you're in love with him, but you broke it off just because you can't tell the world that you're a couple?"

"Pretty much."

"Man, that is the most messed up thing I have ever heard." Blaise almost had to laugh at how stupid his friend seemed to be.

"I know its messed up, but maybe its better this way."

"Why would it be better?

"Because…god damn it! I don't know. I just think it would be better if we aren't together anymore."

"But I thought you loved him?" Blaise asked.

"I did! And I still do!"

"Then, if you love him like you say you do, why did you end it?"

Draco sighed. "I…damn it. I don't know. I can't think straight right now."

"Well, up side is, Potter doesn't seem to be as screwed over by all of this as you."

"Yeah, that hurts too. Its almost as if he doesn't care."

"Well, he looks like he's moved on, so why don't you move on as well?"

"But, I don't want to move on. I don't think I can. I really do love him, Blaise. I think he could be the one."

"So what are you going to do then?"

"I guess I should move on." Draco sighed. "I'll just find someone else, then."

"Won't you be leading them on? I mean, bringing them into a relationship that's just a lie since you're still in love with Potter?"

"I know, but…maybe if I get together with someone, I could get over Harry."

"Alright, man. If you say so." Blaise gave Draco a strange look. _This isn't right._ He thought. _And what the hell is wrong with Potter? Why isn't he affected by this, too? I know for a fact that he's crazy about Draco. He told me so himself. I guess I need to talk to him, too._

Harry sat alone in the boy's dormitory, deep in thought. _I'm so fucked up. I can't believe Draco would do that to me! I hate him!_ Harry stopped thinking as tears started to fall from his eyes. _No, I don't. Damn it. No matter how much I tell myself I hate him, I know its just a lie. I don't hate him…I love him. I'm in love with Draco Malfoy. And it hurts. It hurts SO MUCH. How could he do this to me? He told me he loved me. The stupid LIAR. _

Harry hugged his pillow to his chest as tears fell from his eyes. _Everything he ever said to me was a lie. He never really loved me. And what hurts the most out of all of this is that I still love him. I love him so much it hurts. I HATE this. I wish he'd love me. I wish he would come back to me, saying he was making a mistake._

A small, sad smile appeared on his lips._ Yeah right, like that will ever happen. He doesn't love me. He never will._

Tears continued to fall from his eyes. Harry just sat there and cried. As the tears started to stop, he pulled out a razor from the bag on the floor next to his bed, and lifted up the sleeve of his shirt. He looked at the scars that littered his arm. They were everywhere, going in every direction. In the middle of his arm, there was a small empty space of skin that contained no scars. It was "clean", save for those white lines that always show up after a wound heals. Harry placed the razor against that one clean spot on his arm. He smiled as he felt the almost comforting feeling of the cold blade against his skin. Slowly, he started to pull the blade across until finally, the space contained the words "I love you" in the blood that was seeping from his newly formed wounds.

Harry smiled as the pain from his wounds started to numb his entire arm.

Author's Note: Another chap! Yay! Haha. Hope you enjoyed. Reviews are highly appreciated! Hehe.. tell me what you think. And to those of you who are reading my other stories, especially Lovers and Liars, I might not get around to updating that in a while…serious writer's block for that story. Sorry. Anyway, review! Hehe.


	5. Chapter 5

Harry sat at the Gryffindor table, pushing his food around his plate. He seemed to be deep in thought. He's been looking like that a lot lately.

"Harry, what's wrong?" Hermione asked, concerned for her friend.

"Huh?" Harry looked up from his food, "What?"

"I asked what's wrong," Hermione repeated. "You seemed so out of it lately, is something bothering you?"

Harry put a smile on his face that was, of course, fake. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" Hermione gave him a questioning look. She noticed that he hasn't been acting like himself for a while now. He was always spacing out, keeping to himself, and Hermione didn't think she's actually seen him eat in a while now.

"Of course. Why would something be wrong?" Harry was smiling on the outside, but in the inside, it was a completely different story. _Oh shit,_ he thought, _she better not have noticed anything. The last thing I need right now is Hermione finding out just how screwed over I am._

"Oh…Okay then." Hermione wasn't convinced that he was okay, but she left him alone. For now. "But you should really eat something."

"Yeah, mate." Piped up Ron from beside Hermione, "I haven't seen you eat a thing in…" Ron paused to think, "I don't know how long!"

"I'm not that hungry," replied Harry, going back to pushing his food around his plate, "And, I do eat, don't worry." In his head, Harry knew this was all a lie.

"Oh…" Ron said, Hermione didn't say anything, but she didn't look convinced. "But still, Harry. Get something to eat. Quidditch is coming up soon. We need to you be well fit for it and all that crap."

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot about quidditch," Harry said offhandedly. Harry looked up at Ron and Hermione and saw that they were still looking at him with worried expressions, so he took a small bite of food so he wouldn't worry them.

Hermione and Ron left him alone after they noticed that he was eating. Harry chewed his food slowly. After a while without eating, the food was making him feel nauseous, but so Hermione and Ron wouldn't ask any more questions, he forced himself to eat.

After eating a small meal, Harry quickly told Ron and Hermione that he has to get something and hurried off. He quickly ran down the school corridors into the closest bathroom. Walking inside, he quickly opened a stall and threw up all the food he just ate.

Blaise was in the bathroom when Harry ran in. He walked out of his stall and heard retching. He couldn't tell who it was, but while he was washing his hands, the person finished and walked up to the sink. Blaise raised an eyebrow when he realized that it was Harry.

"Potter?" He asked.

"What?" Harry managed to say in a weak voice. Turning on the faucet, he started to splash water onto his face.

"Oh nothing. But just wondering, what's wrong with you?"

Harry spit before answering. "Nothing's wrong. What's wrong with _you_? Everyone seems to be asking what's wrong. Nothing is wrong with me."

"Don't need to get all defensive, Potter."

"Whatever," said Harry, wiping his hands and face.

"Since you're here, I might as well ask. What's up with you and Draco?"

Harry seemed to tense up at the mention of Draco. "What about us?"

"I don't know. I was just wondering…I know the two of you aren't together anymore…but who ended it? You or Draco?"

"You can't possibly tell me you don't know." Harry clenched his fists. "Malfoy ended it."

"Yeah, I know. But it doesn't look like it, if you know what I mean."

"No I don't. What do you mean?"

"I don't know." Blaise shrugged. "But it looks more like you ended it. Draco can't stop thinking and worry about you."

"Bull," said Harry in a surprisingly cold voice. The coldness of his voice sent chills up Blaise's spine. "Malfoy doesn't give a shit about me."

"Yes, he does." Replied Blaise.

"Yeah right," Harry scoffed. "Malfoy cares about me, and I'm Santa's little helper."

With that, Harry pushed past Blaise and out the door. Blaise stood there and looked at Harry's retreating figure.

"He does care about you, Potter." Blaise said softly, but Harry was already out of the bathroom. "More than you know."

Author's note: Here's another chap. I know I need to start writing longer chapters…and I will…hehe. But I got a lot of writing to do right now…I have to write a 12 page novella for my English class…so yeah… hehe. Anyway, thanks to those who reviewed! I hope you keep reviewing! These reviews make me happy…hehe…or…as happy as I can get since I'm always so depressed… hahaha. Anyway, leave a review. Tell me what you think about it. Feel free to leave suggestions…and if you got any questions…go ahead and ask…


	6. Chapter 6

Tears fell freely, gliding down his cheeks and dropping onto the floor. Harry sat on his bed, crying. It was late at night and everyone was asleep. He placed a silencing charm around his bed so the others wouldn't hear him. He continued to weep. He stopped fighting the tears because the more he fought them the more they fell. He let them fall freely from his eyes. Pulling out a piece of parchment and a quill, he started to write.

_Draco,_

_I have no idea why I'm writing this. I know I won't send it to you, but there are so many things that I want to say to you…and this is the only way I know how. I feel kind of stupid doing this, but I heard somewhere that writing a letter with all your feelings and that kind of crap helps. I don't get it, but I'm willing to give it a shot. _

_Why did you break up with me? I thought you loved me? You know what, Draco? You're nothing but a liar! All those times you said you loved me…you lied, didn't you? You never really loved me…you never really cared. You stupid liar! You never meant it! Everything you said was a lie! I hate you!_

_You know what sucks the most out of all of this? I say I hate you, but I don't mean it. I can't hate you. No matter how hard I try, I just can't. I don't know why I can't hate you. But I guess its because…I love you. I love you, Draco. I truly, honesty love you. And its hurting me to know that you can never return that love to me. There's nothing in this world I want more than to just be with you. _

_I don't know how you manage to do these things to me. But I can't get you out of my head. You're always there. Everything I do, I always end up thinking about you. Everything reminds me of you and me, of us, of our relationship, and everything we did together. The more I try to forget about you, the more I remember the memories of what we shared. I hate this. I sound like a stupid, heartbroken girl whose trying to get her boyfriend back. But just to let you know…I'm not going to try to get you back. No matter how much I want you back…I wont even try. If you don't want to be with me, then nothing I say or do will change that. I can't force you to be in a relationship with me, especially if you don't want to be. So I might as well give up. Trying to get you back will only hurt me more since I know you can never love me like I love you. _

_But I still want to be with you. It's all I really want. You make me happy. Just the thought of you made me happy. But now, the thought of you…I don't know what to think of it. It saddens me because I know that you're gone now, and I can never get you back…but there's still something about seeing you that makes me happy. I guess I've fallen for you...hard…and I can't get over you. Or…I don't guess. I KNOW. I know I love you…nothing will ever change that. _

_I don't know if you've noticed, and I don't think you even care. But I'm not okay anymore, Draco. I'm really not. I haven't been eating in a while. I've been making up stupid excuses saying I'm not hungry and I already ate. Just a few white lies…I'm surprised people believe them. I eat small scraps of food every now and then, just a little something to keep me standing. The last thing I need right now is for Ron and Hermione to find out what I've been doing to myself._

_Also, in addition to the not eating, I've been cutting myself. Strange, isn't it? That the only way I can ease my pain…is to cause myself pain? I know you probably don't want to know this…and, why would you care if I hurt myself and long to die, right? You don't care about me anymore. I hate cutting myself, but it's the only way that I can cope with all of this. I really don't know what I'd do without you. You mean the world to me, Draco. Hell, you ARE my world. I don't know what to do now. Everything just hurts and I feel like shit, so I cut myself to feel better._

_I don't know why I'm still alive. You have no idea how much I want to die. Other than being with you, it's the one thing I want more than anything else. But I think I know why I'm still living, why I'm still holding on. I'm still hoping that there's a chance…a chance for me and you. I still REALLY want to be with you. Even though I know you don't want to be with me and even though I won't try to get you back…I still want to be with you. You have no idea just how much I love you. I'm so pathetic. The only thing I'm holding on to, the only thing in this world that's keeping me alive…its hope…hope that you'll come back to me and we can be happy and in love again. But I know that's never going to happen. So why do I still hope? Why do I let myself suffer like this? It's because I love you and…I just want to be with you again._

_Okay, I'm starting to find this letter useless. I feel like I'm talking to myself. and I probably am, seeing as I won't be sending this to you. _

_I guess what I really want to tell you is that…I love you, Draco. I don't know what I'd do without you. I don't even want to live without you. I love you so much that it hurts. It hurts that I can't be with you, that you can never love me the same way…it just hurts loving you. It hurts so much. But I still love you. I'm crazy, aren't I?_

_I guess I'll just end it here. Not that it'll matter anyway…you won't be getting this._

_Love you always,_

Harry 

Once he completed his letter, Harry read it over. More tears formed in his eyes. The tears fell onto the parchment, staining it a little, and smudging the ink. Harry hastily wiped the tears and folded the parchment and placed it on the envelope. After placing "Draco" onto the envelope, he placed it in the bottom of his trunk, underneath all of his clothes and things.

Author's note: all for now. Haha. I really need to work on writing more chapters…and I will…eventually. Hehe. Review and tell me what you think…I like getting reviews. I don't know why. Haha! Thanks for reading! Review!


	7. Chapter 7

Harry woke the next morning feeling like crap. It was still pretty dark outside. Harry lay back down and tried to get some sleep, but he couldn't.

"This sucks," he sighed, "I slept like, two hours."

Suddenly remembering what he did last night, he went to his trunk and looked for the letter. He found it and opened it, rereading it again. He could feel tears forming in his eyes as he read the letter. And by the time he finished, hot tears were falling down his face.

"Why can't I stop loving you?" He said to himself, although the question was intended for Draco. Sighing, he decided to take a shower.

Harry walked into the Great Hall early. Not a lot of people were there. He hasn't eaten in a while, and he has a quidditch game later that day, so he decided to get something to eat so he won't pass out.

Among the people who were in eating breakfast was Draco; however, after seeing Harry. He became too nervous to eat.

"Draco, mind if I ask a question?" asked Blaise.

"Huh? Oh, sure, go ahead."

"Why is it that whenever you see Potter, you seem to flip out?"

"What do you mean?" Draco was confused and tired. Blaise seemed to always be asking about Harry. "And why do you always ask about him?"

"Well," Blaise sighed. "Every time you see, Potter you suddenly stop everything you're doing and stare at him. You don't notice anything that's going on anymore. I'm pretty sure you got Potter on the mind."

"I don't know, Blaise. I can't seem to get him out of my mind. I mean, I do, but then I see him and he's all I can think about."

"Why don't you just get back together with him? It's obvious that you want to be with him."

"I don't think I should." Draco sighed again. "Maybe I should find someone else."

"But then you'll just be in a relationship that's nothing but a lie!" Blaise couldn't believe how stupid Draco could get at times. He knew that Draco doesn't want to be with anyone else, and getting into a relationship will probably make things worse.

"Well, maybe I can learn to love whoever I ask out. And it's not like Harry cares anyway." There was a sad tone to Draco's voice now.

"I'm sure he still cares," Blaise thought of the time he saw Harry in the bathroom. He looked depressed, and he was sure that the throwing up had something to do with the fact that that was the first time he saw Harry eat since the break up.

"Yeah right," scoffed Draco. "You've seen him. It doesn't seem to affect him one bit."

"How would you know? You haven't gotten close enough to him to notice much about how he's been acting."

"You haven't either. And, I don't know, okay? But I still say he doesn't care."

"Don't say it if you don't know it for sure."

"Whatever," Draco replied.

Blaise was too tired of arguing with his friend. It was always the same thing over and over. He would tell Draco to get back with Harry, Draco would tell him that Harry doesn't care about him anymore, Blaise would try to convince him that Harry does care, but Draco never believes him. Blaise wanted to tell Draco about the incident with Harry in the bathroom, but he didn't think he should. _I guess that'll just be a secret between me and Harry,_ Blaise thought.

--

Draco sat in the bleachers and watched Harry's match. He seemed so out of it; it didn't look like he was concentrating on the game at all. Draco had seen the snitch right by Harry several times already, but Harry didn't seem to notice it.

"Something's up," Draco muttered.

"What?" Asked Blaise, who was sitting next to him.

"Nothing, I was just saying that something's up with Harry's game."

"Yeah, I noticed. He seems so out of it. I wonder why…"

"Yeah…" Draco continued to watch Harry.

Up in the air, Harry was having a hard time. _Damn it, Harry. Focus!_ He thought to himself. He'd seen the snitch a few times already, but every time he tried to get to it, his mind would drift off and he'd lose sight of the snitch.

"Stop looking at him!" he said to himself. He constantly found his gaze drifting over to where Draco was sitting with the rest of the Slytherins.

Harry flew around the field, looking for the snitch. He saw the other seeker not far from him, doing the same thing. Flying higher, he continued his search. Then, out of the corner of his eye, he noticed the other seeker going after something.

"Shit!" Harry cursed and flew in the direction the other Ravenclaw seeker was going. The seeker had found the snitch. Harry tried to force his broom to go faster, but he was too far away. The seeker caught the snitch and the game was over. But luckily, Gryffindor chasers scored a lot, it was enough to make Gryffindor win the game, but only by ten points.

"Harry, what happened, mate?" Ron asked as they flew down.

"Nothing, I just didn't see the snitch first." Harry said.

"Uh, okay then…" Ron said. He noticed that Harry seemed to be in a bad mood and didn't want to talk, so he let him have his space for a while.

--

Draco stood up and headed down the bleachers with everyone else. All around him, he could hear everyone talk about Harry and how surprised they were that he didn't see the snitch.

"He didn't even look like he was playing. He just flew around." Draco heard some random student behind him say.

"I know what you mean," said another student, "The only time he played, was when the Ravenclaw seeker was already going after the snitch."

Questions ran through Draco's head. _It's not like Harry to be like this. He loves playing quidditch. Why wasn't he focused on the game? Something's wrong with him. But…what? Could it be me breaking up with him? Maybe Blaise was right when he said that Harry does care…?_


	8. Chapter 8

"A penny for your thoughts?"

"Huh?" Draco looked up and saw Blaise taking the seat beside him. "What?"

"Nothing," Blaise chuckled, "You just seemed deep in thought is all. Care to tell me what's on your mind?"

"Oh, nothing." Replied Draco, "Just thinking of a few guys."

"You're not looking for a replacement for Potter, are you?"

"Yeah, I am. I think I just found a guy." Draco replied with a smile that didn't reach his eyes.

"Why? Wait, who?" Blaise frowned; he didn't really think Draco would go through with it.

"Ron Weasley."

"What! Are you crazy?!" Blaise exploded.

"No, I'm not," Draco said with a somewhat angry tone. "What makes you say that?"

"You already broke up with the guy for no good reason. Now you're going to go out with his best friend? What are you? Stupid?"

"No." Draco was angry with him now. "Ron's nice, he don't look bad either, and he's into guys. What's wrong with going out with him?"

"Other than the fact that he's Potter's best friend?" The sarcasm was evident in his voice.

"Harry doesn't care that I broke it off with him, so why would he care if I asked out his best friend?"

"Draco," Blaise sighed. "How many times do we have to go over this? Harry does care about you."

"No, he doesn't. We don't have to keep going over this all the time if you just quit thinking that he cares because Harry does NOT care."

"I give up," Blaise sighed.

"Good," Draco replied with a smug smile.

--

Ron was walking to class when he heard someone calling his name. It was Draco Malfoy.

"Malfoy, what do you want?" Ron asked, looking at him suspiciously.

"Oh nothing. We're walking the same way to class, so I may as well walk with you, right?" Draco replied with a small smile.

"Okay?" Ron raised an eyebrow at him. "What have you been smoking?"

"Nothing," Draco said with a laugh, "I just want…to put this whole enemy thing behind us. Can't we be friends?" Draco extended his hand out to Ron and gave him on of his most charming smiles.

A blush crept up Ron's cheeks as he shook Draco's hand. _Since when has Malfoy looked this good? Wait! I can't be thinking like this…he's Harry's ex-boyfriend._

"So," said Draco as they entered the class, "I guess I'll see you around?"

"Yeah, see you." Ron stuttered before taking a seat next to Hermione.

The only people in class who noticed that Draco and Ron were being civil towards each other were Blaise, Hermione, and Harry. Blaise was shaking his head at Draco's antics, and Hermione was confused by all of this. As for Harry, there was no emotion of his face, but inside, he was breaking apart.

--

"Hey, Harry!" Ron said, trying to catch up with his friend.

"Yeah?" Harry said as he stopped and waited for Ron.

"I was just wondering…" Ron didn't know how to say this to Harry.

"What is it?"

"Well, you're over Draco now, aren't you?"

"What?" Harry felt a pang in his chest, right where his heart was. He made assumptions when he saw Ron and Draco walk into class together, and Ron's questions just proved that his guesses were right.

"I mean, I know you really liked him and all…but, your over him now, right?"

"Yeah," Harry lied.

"Oh, good. So like, you won't mind if ahh…well…" Ron was having a hard time saying this.

"If you like him?" Harry asked with a fake smile on his face.

"Huh?" Ron's cheeks and ears started to redden, "What makes you say that?"

"Call it a hunch," Harry said with a laugh that sounded so wrong in his ears.

"Well, I don't like him…" Ron trailed off.

"Really?" Harry seemed hopeful.

"Well, I don't really know him that well. But he is cute…"

"Oh…" Harry's hopes were crushed as he heard Ron say that. "I have to go get some stuff done so I'll see you later, alright?"

"Oh, okay." Ron said as Harry turned away and walked off.

If Ron wasn't so busy thinking about Draco, he might have noticed something different in Harry's eyes. He might have noticed that there were tears in them. But he didn't. Since Harry told him he was over Draco, Ron figured that it would be okay for him to like Draco. _Well, Harry seems okay with it. I don't ever want to do something that hurts him, but he didn't seem the least bit hurt._ Ron thought to himself with a smile.

Author's note: well, what do you think? Please don't hate me! Hehe. Leave a review and tell me what you think and for those who are wondering, Draco and Ron's relationship…it won't last…hehe. This will be a Harry/Draco story in the end. Thanks for reading! Review!


	9. Chapter 9

Harry stared out the window at the moon; he was up late again because he couldn't sleep. Thoughts about Ron and Draco were going through his head. Tired of just sitting there and drowning in his misery, he pulled out a leather-bound book. The book was blank, but Harry was about to fill its pages with writing.

Why can't I get over him? I keep telling myself that I don't care what he does with his life anymore, so why did it hurt when I saw him with Ron? I don't want him to be with Ron! And…I don't want Ron to like him. And, what's Draco thinking? Ron is my best friend. He just broke up with me, and now he's going after my friend? I hate him so much…but I still love him. God, I'm hopeless!

I don't know what to do about Ron. I don't want to see him and Draco together. I know that'll just kill me. I already told him that I was over him, it'll be stupid to take that back. And Ron seems to really like him. He kept staring at Draco at dinner and would always blush at the sound of his name and all that stupid crap. Ron's my friend, and I shouldn't stop him from liking someone. That's just not right. And…I don't know.

_I'm so confused now. I love Draco, but he likes Ron. Ron's my best friend, and he likes Draco. It probably won't be long before the two of them will get together and I don't want that to happen. I don't want them to get together but there's nothing I can do about it. Draco doesn't give a damn about me, and Ron…I can't stop him from being with someone he likes. Love really is messed up, isn't it?_

Harry sighed; he turned to the next page of the book, but was suddenly not in the mood to write anymore. His heart still seemed to be hurting and tears were starting to form in his eyes. Sighing, he pulled out a razor and pulled up his sleeve. Finding a nice spot on his arm, he started to cut himself.

After making a few cuts, he stopped and just watched the blood seep from them. The blood dripped down onto the open book that he was just writing in. Harry tried to wipe the blood from the page, but only smeared it. He looked at the page that now contained a bit of his blood. Then, for no apparent reason, he put his arm on top of the page and wiped his blood on it. By the time he stopped bleeding, most of the page had been covered in his blood.

"Well, that's a nice way to clean up the blood." He chuckled to himself.

He cleaned up what little blood was still on his arm before turning back to the book. He put the quill and ink away, and after making sure the blood had dried, he closed his book and put it away. He put it at the bottom of his trunk, with the letter to Draco, to make sure that no one will see it. Going under the covers, he tried to get some sleep.

Harry lay in his bed for a while longer. He still couldn't get some sleep. Turning over to his side, he closed his eyes and tried to let sleep take over his body. But no luck. His thoughts started to drift off, suddenly he was thinking of Draco and Ron again. This time, he couldn't stop the tears. Just the possibility of the two getting together hurt him. His chest started to hurt more that ever before, and he felt like he was going to throw up, but he didn't. He just lay there until he finally cried himself to sleep.

--

Harry sat at the Gryffindor table, playing with his food, while his friends ate their breakfast.

"Why aren't you eating, Harry?" Hemione asked.

"I'm just not that hungry," replied Harry.

"Well, okay then." Hermione frowned; not liking that Harry skipped so many meals. "But at least drink something."

"Okay," mumbled Harry, taking small sips from his orange juice.

"Hey, Ron," said a voice from behind Harry. Harry immediately recognized that voice and felt his blood run cold.

"Oh, hey, Draco." Ron replied shyly.

"Can I speak with you?" Draco asked, "in private?"

"Uhm, sure," Ron got off his seat and followed Draco outside the Great Hall.

"I wonder what that's about." Hermione asked with a suspicious tone to her voice. Harry had his fists clenched and was biting on the inside of his cheek so he wouldn't start to cry, while Blaise just watched from the Slytherin table, shaking his head.

Outside the Hall, Ron was getting nervous.

"So, what did you want to talk to me about?" asked Ron.

"Well, I was wondering…" Draco trailed off and looked down at his shoes.

"Wondering what?" Ron asked.

"Well, I don't know how to put this but…will you go out with me?"

"What?" Ron was shocked and happy at the same time. He didn't know what to say, but he was also having a hard time keeping the grin of his face.

"If you don't want to, then its okay," said Draco in a dejected voice.

"No! It's not that!" Ron said quickly, "It's just that…you went out with Harry…and…I don't know."

"Well, Potter doesn't seem to give a damn what I do. Why will he care if I ask you out?"

"Well…Harry did say he was over you."

"See?" Draco had a warm smile on his face, but inside, his heart was shattering hearing that Harry was over him.

"Well, I still don't know. I just want to make sure, you know, talk to him about it and stuff."

"Oh…"

"Is it alright if I answer you later?"

"Sure thing," said Draco giving Ron one of his most charming smiles, causing him to blush.

--

Ron returned to the table with a flushed face. Looking up, he saw that Hermione was giving him a questioning look, while Harry was looking down at his food, his hair covering his eyes.

"What was that about?" Hermione asked.

"Nothing," Ron stuttered, his face turning even redder. "He just wanted to ask me something."

"What did he ask?"

"Well…" Ron was interrupted by Harry standing up.

"Hey, I just remembered something. I'll see you guys in class, alright?"

"Okay," the two said in unison.

Over at the Slytherin table, Blaise noticed Harry leaving the table. He also noticed what the others failed to see: tears were forming in Harry's eyes. Excusing himself from the table, he quickly walked out and followed Harry.

Harry was running by the time Blaise got out of the Great Hall, but he could tell that Harry was running to the bathroom. Everyone was in the Great Hall eating breakfast, so Blaise knew that they wouldn't be interrupted.

Blaise was shocked the what he saw when he opened the bathroom door. There, by the sink, was Harry Potter with a bloody razor in his arm and blood coming from scars on his arms.

"What the hell are you doing?" Blaise said.

"What are you doing here?" Harry asked in a surprisingly calm voice. He turned on the faucet and let the water clean his wounds.

"Huh?" Blaise couldn't think straight. He couldn't believe that Harry was cutting himself.

"What do you want?" Harry asked, wiping his arm dry and looking up at Blaise.

"I saw you leave after the whole Draco-Weasley thing and I thought I'd see what was up."

"Why would you care?"

"Because…" Blaise stopped to think. "You know what? I don't really know. But I got nothing against you, Potter, and I, for one, think that what Draco is doing is stupid."

"What's so stupid? That he wants to go out with my _best friend_?" Harry said the words best friends with some malice in his voice.

"Well…yeah…but wait, since when do you self-mutilate?" Blaise looked at the scars on Harry's arm. He could see a lot of them.

"Hmm. I don't know," Harry said with a slightly sarcastic tone, "Probably since Malfoy broke up with me."

"What?" Blaise expected that answer, but he was still shocked hearing it. "So you're cutting yourself because of him?"

"I'm not cutting myself because of him. I'm doing it because I want to. I like it, okay?"

"Bloody hell, Potter. What kind of person in their right minds would like hurting themselves?"

"Like I know? Maybe I'm not in my right mind after all then."

"But, then…what?" Blaise didn't know what to say.

Then, out of nowhere, Harry had a break down. He fell to his knees and started to cry. Blaise didn't know what to do, so he knelt down and placed a comforting hand on Harry's shoulder.

"How could he do that?" Harry cried into Blaise's shoulder. "I thought he loved me."

"I don't know what's going on with Draco right now." Blaise lied. He couldn't tell Harry what Draco has been saying, it would probably just make things more complicated.

"Stupid bastard. I thought he loved me…"

"Maybe he still does…?"

"No he doesn't! He likes Ron now!" Harry pulled away from Blaise and started wiping the tears from his eyes. "Shit, I'm so damn tired of crying over Malfoy!"

"Then why don't you just stop?"

"I'm trying to," Harry said as he and Blaise stood up. "But it's hard. I want to get over him, but I can't. You're his friend, do you know why he did that?"

"I don't really know anymore. Draco is screwed up right now."

"Hell yeah," said Harry while Blaise just chuckled.

"So…about you're cutting?"

"Long story." Replied Harry.

So far, Blaise had only heard Draco's side of the break up, but now, he was hearing Harry's. Harry told him everything about the break up and how it affected him. He also told Blaise about how he's being affected by the way Draco acts and the whole deal with Ron.

And in that small amount of time, even if they hadn't noticed it yet, the two boys had gotten closer.

Note: Another chapter done! Yay! Hehe. You know, I think this is my longest chapter yet. I'm going to try and make longer ones. Hehe. Review and tell me what you think!


	10. Chapter 10

Draco sat in class, looking around for Blaise. His friend still hadn't shown up and class was about to. It was not like him to be late. About a minute before class started, Blaise showed up. What shocked Draco was the person he entered the class with; Blaise walked into class with Harry Potter.

"See you later, Harry," Blaise said, as he took the seat next to Draco.

"Yeah, see you," replied Harry as he walked to where Hermione and Ron were sitting.

"What was that about?" Draco asked. The class had already started, but it was History of Magic, so Draco did not have to worry about getting in trouble.

"What was what about?" Blaise raised an eyebrow as he tried to listen to their teacher drone on about something.

"You and Harry."

"What about me and Harry?"

"You walked into class with him."

"So? Is there something wrong with that?" Blaise turned to Draco and looked at him questioningly.

"You know how I feel about Harry." Draco said in a whisper.

"Yeah, well, what about you and Weasley?" Blaise shot back.

"Didn't we already go over this?"

"Yeah, we did," Blaise glared slightly at Draco, "So I see no reason for us to talk about anything right now."

Draco tried to continue talking to Blaise, but he couldn't get the other Slytherin to talk to him.

--

"What were you and Zabini doing together?" Ron asked Harry.

"Nothing, I just met him when I left the breakfast. We talked for a bit and since we had the same class, we walked together," Harry wasn't looking at Ron as he said this; he was looking forward, trying to focus on what the teacher is saying.

"Oh okay," Ron said. He stopped trying to talk to Harry because it seemed that Harry was not intent on listening to him.

--

"Harry, do you think we can talk?" Ron asked. He and Harry were alone in the boys' dormitory.

"Sure, what do you want?" Harry said, looking up from the book he was reading.

"Well, uh, I don't know how to put this."

"Then try…?"

Ron put a locking charm on the door so no one can enter while they were talking. "Well, it's about Draco."

"Oh yeah. Malfoy wanted to speak with you. My guess is that he asked you out?" Harry said in a calm and somewhat cold voice.

"Ah, yeah…he did." The way Harry was acting was making Ron really nervous.

"And you said…?"

"I told him I'll answer him later."

"Why?" Harry was shocked to hear that. "I thought you liked him?"

"Well, I do. And I'm willing to give a relationship with him a shot, but I wanted to know how you'd take it first."

"Hmm." A small smile appeared on Harry's face. Though Harry was upset about Draco asking Ron out, he was glad that his friend still thought about how he'd feel. "I say, go for it. You like him, don't you?"

"I do, but you _did_ go out with him first…and you guys broke up like…not even a month ago."

"I know, but I don't really care." Harry lied through his teeth. "If you want to go out with him, then go ahead, he's all yours."

"Really?" Ron's face seemed to brighten up as he said this.

"Yeah," Harry said, looking back down at his book. He was afraid that if he looked at Ron directly, Ron will be able to tell that he was trying not to cry.

"Wow, mate. Thanks. I didn't think you'd take it so easily."

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever," Harry muttered. "We aren't together anymore, so what he does really isn't any of my concern. If you want to go out with him, then go ahead. Oh, and good luck with your relationship."

"Thanks, mate!" Ron was so happy and excited about all of this that he didn't notice how Harry was acting. He didn't notice that his voice shook when he was saying those things to him, and that he was hiding his eyes from Ron. Ron was so absorbed in his happiness that he didn't realize all the pain that his _best friend_ was going through.


	11. Chapter 11

Harry sat on his bed, watching Ron look for something to wear.

"Ron, you've been looking through all your clothes for hours. Can't you pick something already?" Harry asked, getting annoyed by Ron.

"But Harry. I'm going to say yes to Draco. I want to look perfect!" Ron replied giddily.

"You're acting like a girl," Harry mumbled under his breath.

"What was that?" Ron asked.

"Nothing,"

"Oh, okay. What do you think of this?" Ron held up a shirt in front of him and showed it to Harry.

"It's fine. Wear that and let's go already."

"Are you sure? Maybe I should put on a different shirt…" Ron said thoughtfully.

"I'm going to go downstairs before breakfast is over, alright?" Harry stood up and walked to the door.

"Okay then," Ron said, but Harry was already out the door. "I wonder what's bothering him?"

Harry was up to the door to the Great Hall and found Blaise and Draco standing there.

"Hey, Harry," greeted Blaise. Draco just stood there and looked at Harry, a strange look in his eyes.

"Blaise, what are you doing here?" Harry asked, giving him a small smile. Harry tried not to look at Draco. He couldn't face him now that he knew he liked Ron.

"Draco is supposed to meet up with that friend of yours," there was a slight hint of disgust in Blaise's voice. "Where is he, anyway?"

"What friend? You mean Ron?"

"Yeah, him."

"Oh, he's still up in the dorm looking for something to wear. He's worse than a girl."

"That's no way to speak about your friend," Draco finally spoke up.

"Why? It's true," Harry sounded annoyed. Blaise just laughed.

"Since when do you talk about your friends behind your back?" Draco sounded angry. But inside, he was surprised to hear Harry talk like that. The Harry he knew wasn't like that.

"I'm not talking about him behind his back," Harry glared at Draco. "I'm just saying that he's acting like a girl."

"Whose acting like a girl?" Ron asked, who had just walked up to the three boys. He hadn't heard what they were talking about, just the last thing Harry said.

"No one," Harry said walking in the door with Blaise following him.

"What was that about?" Ron asked Draco.

"I don't know," Draco replied, looking at Harry and Blaise walk up to their tables and eat. "So, do you have an answer for me?"

"Yeah, I do." Ron started to blush.

"Well…?"

"My answer is yes," Ron's face was completely red by now.

"That's great," said Draco, giving Ron a warm smile.

"Yeah, sorry for the wait. I just wanted to make sure it was okay with Harry. You two did go out after all…"

"So I'm guessing Harry's okay with it?"

"Yeah, he said he was over you and stuff, so it's all good." Ron smiled brightly. Draco smiled back, however, he was hurting inside.

_He really doesn't care anymore,_ Draco thought to himself. He pushed thoughts of Harry to the back of his head so that he wouldn't start to cry. He could already feel the tears starting to form in his eyes. Giving Ron another smile, the two of them walked into the Great Hall, hand in hand.

Hermione raised an eyebrow when she saw Ron and Draco walk in. Harry looked up from his plate and saw them. His already broken heart continued to shatter when he saw their hands.

"Did I just miss something?" Hermione asked Harry.

"Well, Draco asked Ron out, Ron told him to wait, talked to me, then told Draco yes," replied Harry.

"What? Why?" Hermione wanted answers, but Harry just shrugged.

"That's not right!" Hermione exclaimed, "Ron's your best friend. He should know better than to go out with Draco."

"Yeah well, they're going out now. Nothing we can do about it," said Harry in a dejected voice.

"Wait, didn't you say Ron talked to you before saying yes?"

"Yup," Harry started to play with the food on his plate.

"What did you say?"

"I told him to go ahead,"

"Why?"

"Because I don't care."

"But you do care, don't you?" Hermione looked at Harry.

"What makes you say that?" Harry looked up at Hermione.

"Oh come on, Harry. You know you're lying to yourself when you say you don't care."

"Well, there's nothing I can do about this," Harry sighed.

"You could've told Ron that you didn't want him to go out with Draco."

"I can't do that to him. He really likes Draco," Harry clenched his fist.

"Ron's your best friend, I'm sure he'll understand."

"Well, I told my _best friend_ that it was okay already. I can't take that back now." Harry said the word best friend with disgust.

"Hey guys," Ron and Draco appeared behind Harry and Hermione. Ron bid Draco goodbye before taking a seat. "What's up?"

Harry went back to playing with his food, and Hermione took a bite out of some toast so she wouldn't have to answer. Ron was so happy to be with Draco that he didn't notice his friends' reactions.

"I'm done," Harry quickly stood up from the table.

"Me too," said Hermione.

"What?" Ron looked up at them confused. "You're going already?"

"Yeah, I have to do something," Hermione lied. Harry didn't say anything.

Harry and Hermione quickly left the table, leaving Ron all by himself. At the Slytherin table, Blaise stood up and left, leaving a confused Draco behind.

Blaise met up with Hermione and Harry outside the door. "So, I'm guessing you know about Draco and Weasley?"

"Yeah," Hermione replied. Harry just looked down.

"Lighten up, Potter. I doubt it will last long," said Blaise, trying to cheer Harry up.

"That's not the point, though," Hermione said. "Ron's Harry's best friend. He should know better than to go out with Harry's ex-boyfriend."

"Whatever." Harry spoke up. "I don't really want to talk about this, okay?"

"Alright," Blaise and Hermione said in unison. The three of them then headed for the lake. Since it was Saturday, they didn't have to worry about going to class.

Note: Another chapter done! Yay! Lol. So, what do you think? Liked it? Hated it? Want me to continue? Wish I would die? Review and tell me…hehehe…


	12. Chapter 12

Harry, Hermione, and Blaise sat by the lake. No one said anything, the three of them sat in a comfortable silence.

"So," said Blaise, finally breaking the silence, "why'd you tell Ron it was okay to be with Draco?"

"I thought we weren't going to talk about that?" asked Harry.

"But I'm curious," said Blaise with a playful smirk.

"Yeah, Harry," said Hermione, "I want to know why, too."

"I don't really know why," Harry answered after a moment of silence.

"Huh?" Blaise and Hermione were confused.

"Well," Harry started, "It's complicated. I mean, I love Draco, and I still want him to be with me, but there's nothing I can do about it, right? If Draco doesn't want to be with Ron, I can't really stop him, can I? And Ron wants to be with him, too. He's my friend, and he should be happy. You can't help who you fall in love with. Me and Ron just happened to fall in love with the same person. And if Draco chooses to love Ron and not me, well, there's nothing I can do about that."

"Oh Harry…" Hermione didn't know what to say and Blaise stayed quiet. Tears had started to form in Harry's eyes while he was talking. Now, he was doing all he could to stop them from falling.

"Harry…" Blaise decided that he should tell him about Draco.

"Yeah?" Harry looked up at Blaise.

"Draco told me this thing shortly after you two broke up. He loves you Harry."

"Bullshit," Harry spat out.

"I know what you mean," said Blaise. "But that's what he said. He said he loves you. But he can't be with you because of…something."

"What?" Harry asked; Hermione was waiting for the answer as well.

"The thing is," Blaise sighed, "I don't really know. I don't think Draco knows either. Something about the whole, hiding this. I guess he doesn't want to hide it."

"Stupid bastard," muttered Harry. "Liar."

"Huh?" said Hermione.

"Draco is nothing but a liar. He told me he was okay with the hiding, as long as he was with me. LIAR!" Harry shouted out. The tears had finally started to fall.

Hermione got up and placed an arm around Harry while Blaise sat on his other side and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. The three of them just sat there. Harry, in the middle, had his knees drawn up and rested his head on them, crying his eyes out. Hermione, who was sitting on his right side, had an arm around his waist and hugged him as he cried. Blaise, who was on his left, was patting his back comfortingly. The three of them sat in silence; Blaise and Hermione were unsure of what to say.

--

After finishing his breakfast, Draco went to the Gryffindor table to see Ron, who was just finishing up.

"What happened to your friends?" Draco asked casually. He had seen Blaise walk out with Hermione and Harry.

"I don't know, Hermione said she had to do something or whatever and Harry didn't say anything. He just left." Ron stood up. He and Draco walked out of the Great Hall together.

"Hmm, is Harry really like that?" Draco tried to sound as casual as usual. _Pretty stupid to ask my new boyfriend about my old one,_ he thought to himself.

"Well, no," Ron answered, "he's been acting strange lately."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know; he just seems more…withdrawn? He's been keeping to himself a lot lately, and when he is with us, he barely says anything."

"That's strange," Draco took hold of Ron's hand, but his thoughts were on Harry.

"I know, its like he's a completely different person now. I wonder what happened…"

"When did he start being like this?" Draco was dreading the answer. He had a feeling that Ron would say that it happened after the break up. But luckily, Ron gave him a different answer.

"Sometime after the winter holidays, I guess. Or…I don't know. I can't remember," Ron gave Draco a sheepish smile as he blushed slightly. Draco let out a light laugh.

Ron and Draco went outside to the lake. When they approached the lake, the saw Hermione, Harry, and Blaise.

"Hey, there they are!" Ron exclaimed. He walked up to them, pulling Draco along with him. The three by the lake had heard Ron and looked up at them. Harry cursed under his breath and wiped at his eyes.

"Hey, I thought you had something to do?" Ron asked Hermione.

"I decided to put it off 'til later," she replied.

"Oh, okay," Ron took a seat besides Hermione; Draco sat besides Ron.

"What are you guys doing out here?" Ron asked

"Followed Harry," Hermione and Blaise said in unison. Harry had finished drying his eyes. However, his eyes were still a little red. Everyone looked at Harry, waiting for an answer.

"Nothing, just wanted to think."

"At a lake?" Draco commented.

"It's quiet here, go figure," Harry sounded annoyed.

The five of them did not say anything. They sat in an awkward silence, the tension around them thick. The only one who didn't seem to notice the tension was Ron.

"Man, its quiet," Ron commented after a while.

"Really? I didn't notice," sarcasm was dripping from Blaise's voice. Ron blushed out of embarrassment, and instantly shut up. Draco glared at Blaise.

Harry suddenly stood up, "I'm heading inside."

"I'll come with you," Blaise stood up as well. Hermione didn't say anything, but stood up and followed the two boys back to the castle.

"What was that about?" Draco asked as he watched the three walk away.

"I don't know…" answered Ron, "Hey, Draco."

"Yeah?"

"Blaise doesn't like me, does he?" Ron seemed sad.

"What do you mean?" Draco placed his arm around Ron's shoulders.

"That thing that just happened. I don't know. I just don't think he likes me."

"He just needs time to get used to you. Blaise is like that at times. I'll talk to him about it." Draco pulled Ron closer to him.

"Okay, good. Because I don't want your best friend hating me." Ron leaned in closer to Draco.

Author's note: Hah! Another chapter done! LOL. I actually got this done the same day as chapter eleven. I don't know why I didn't post them up at the same time. I'm weird. HAHA! Review!

Thank you to everyone who reviewed! I love you guys! Hehehe..


	13. Chapter 13

"What's your problem?" Draco asked Blaise. Blaise looked up from the book he was reading and raised an eyebrow at him. They were the only two in the boys' dormitory.

"What are you talking about?" Blaise asked, placing the book down.

"You know what I'm talking about!" Draco seemed angry, "why are you so mean to Ron?"

"Why do you care?"

"He's my boyfriend! You should at least act civil with him."

"I thought you didn't really care about him? Aren't you just using him because you need someone to take Harry's place? Seriously, Draco, that's really low."

"That's not true! What's wrong with you?" Draco's face was red with anger.

"What's wrong with me? What's wrong with you?" Blaise stood up so he was leveled with Draco. "It's bad enough that you hurt Harry. But do you have to add salt to the wound by going out with his best friend?"

"Okay, first of all, I DID NOT hurt Harry. He doesn't care what I do. And Harry was the one who told Ron it was okay for him to say yes to me."

"So? Just because he says that, doesn't mean its okay. And what's wrong with Weasley anyway? Who, in their right mind, would go out with their best friend's ex?"

"There's nothing wrong with that!" Draco glared at Blaise who glared back, with equal intensity.

--

"Ron! We need to talk!" Ron looked up to see Ginny walking up to him; she looked angry.

"What?" he asked.

"Why did I see you holding Draco Malfoy's hand at breakfast?"

"Oh," a small blush appeared on Ron's face. "Well, you see, we're going out now."

"What!" Ginny was shocked to hear that, even though she expected it. "Why?"

"What do you mean 'why'?"

"Of all people, why Malfoy! Have you gone mad?" Ginny was shouting now, catching the attention of everyone in the common room. Everyone was giving Ron strange looks.

"What's wrong with Draco?" Ron face heated up. He could feel everyone's eyes on him.

"Other than the fact that he's a Slythenin? And that he's been making our lives a living hell since he got to Hogwarts?" Ginny didn't seem to notice that everyone was looking at them.

"He's not like that anymore! And there's nothing wrong with him being a Slytherin. You have friends you are Slytherins!" Ron stood up. He had started to shout.

"That's different!"

"How is that different?"

"My Slytherin friends are NOT like Malfoy!"

"There's nothing wrong with Draco!"

"He's a bastard!"

"Don't call him that!" Ron clenched his fists at his sides, "What kind of sister are you? Can't you at least be happy for me?"

"What's to be happy about? You're going out with a bastard! There's nothing to be happy about there."

"Bitch!" Ron's eyes widened, he couldn't believe that he called her that. The word slipped Ron's mouth before he could stop it. Everyone in the room looked at Ginny, waiting to see what she will do. Ginny's hand reached up and slapped Ron, hard. If looks could kill, Ron would have dies a million times already by Ginny's glare. Turning around, she walked out of the common room, slamming the door behind her. Everyone else in the room looked at Ron. Some were shaking their heads at him; others just gave him disappointed looks. Ron let out a frustrated sigh and sat back down on the couch.

--

Ron met up with Draco in front of the Great Hall at lunch. Harry, Hermione, and Blaise were there, too, but they didn't seem to pay much attention to the two. Draco seemed to be in a very bad mood while Ron just seemed upset. Draco and Ron walked in hand in hand once more, while the other three stayed for a while.

"What's up with Weasley?" asked Blaise.

"I don't know," replied Hermione, "but Lavender told me that something happened between him and Ginny. What's wrong with Malfoy?"

"Oh, hah, we got into this argument, and I punched him," a smug smile graced Blaise's lips.

"Really?" Hermione asked. Harry didn't say anything, but waited for Blaise's answer.

"Yeah, right by his left eye. He's hiding it with a charm right now."

"Serves him right," Hermione laughed, Harry chuckled as well.

"Why'd you punch him though?" Harry asked.

"Ah, long story. Tell you after lunch?"

"Sure," The three walked into the Great Hall and went to their separate tables for lunch.

At the Gryffindor table, Ron was moping around. Harry and Hermione tried to ignore him, but his sighing was starting to really annoy them.

"What's wrong with you?" Hermione sounded irritated.

"Ginny," was Ron's short reply. Ginny passed by them at that moment with her friends. They all glared at Ron before finding a seat as far away from him as possible.

"What about Ginny?" asked Harry, finally saying something to Ron.

"We got into this huge argument in the common room earlier."

"What about?" asked Hermione, taking a bite out of her sandwich.

"Draco,"

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, apparently, she didn't like the idea of me and him being together."

"So…?" Hermione and Harry asked at the same time, curious to know what had happened.

"We started shouting and stuff, then I called her a bitch."

"What!" Harry and Hermione said in unison.

"I know, I know," said Ron, "it slipped out before I realized it."

"So what happened after?" Asked Hermione.

"Ginny slapped me," Ron sighed. It was then that Harry and Hermione noticed the slight redness on the left side of Ron's face. Harry smirked and had to fake a cough to hide his laughter, while Hermione tried to stifle a giggle.

At the Slytherin table, Draco was glaring at Blaise.

"What do you want?" Blaise finally asked, getting tired of Draco looking at him. Draco glared at him once more and turned away. Blaise could only chuckle at Draco's childish antics.

Author's note: Another chapter! Hah! Review, tell me what you think. You should know that by now, noh? Haha. Me so weird. Hehe. Anyway, this is going to be a Draco Harry story in the end, just to let you people know. Review! Hehe.


	14. Chapter 14

It had been a week since Ron and Draco had started going out, and Harry was still not taking it well. Blaise and Hermione grew worried; everyday, Harry seemed to be getting worse. What worried them the most was that he was starting to cut himself more than ever; it seemed like everyday, new cuts would appear on his arms.

"Harry, are you okay?" Hermione asked. The three of them were at the lake once more. Harry was in one of his 'moods' and wasn't talking. His sleeves were up, since he didn't have to hide his scars from Hermione and Blaise. His arm was covered with more cuts. They seemed to cover his entire arm, and a few that were near his wrist were still very red.

Harry didn't say anything; he just shook his head no. Hermione and Blaise decided not to push it because it will only anger him more. So the three friends just sat there. Harry, hugging his knees to his chest, stared at the lake and let his thoughts wonder. Hermione, sat there, doing some homework, and Blaise, sat there reading a book. The three were content with just keeping each other company.

--

"What's wrong?" Draco asked Ron. Ron had been so out of it this past week.

"What do you mean?" Ron looked up from the book he was reading. The two of them were in the library, working on some homework together.

"You've seemed so down lately."

"Oh, its nothing, its just, Ginny…and Harry and Hermione. Blaise, too."

"You and Ginny still haven't worked things out?"

"No," Ron sighed, "she still won't talk to me. And she told Fred and George about it."

"What happened?"

"Nothing, the twins just sent a howler."

"When did you get a howler?"

"Last night. My family has been embarrassing my in front of the entire Gryffindor house lately."

"Some family," Draco sneered.

"Yeah, I know."

"So what about Harry, Hermione and Blaise?"

"Well, they seem so distant. Harry and Hermione I mean. Well, Harry's been distant a lot, so its not _that_ new, but Hermione. I don't know, its like something's going on that I don't know about. And Blaise, well, he _really _doesn't like me. And I hate that."

"Well, your friends won't listen to me, and the last time I talked to Blaise…well, it didn't turn out well."

"Yeah," Ron sighed.

"I'm sorry I can't help you feel better," Draco grabbed Ron's hand and gave it a comforting squeeze.

"It's alright," Ron smiled at Draco, "even if I'm having problems with them, at least you're making me happy!"

Draco didn't say anything; he just smiled back. Inside, he was starting to feel guilty. He didn't like Ron the way that Ron liked him. He knew that for sure now. And he wasn't sure that he could ever love Ron like he loved Harry. He was too in love with Harry. _But he doesn't love me anymore. I HAVE to move on._ He thought to himself. Placing another smile on his face, he continued with his work.

--

Harry sat there and thought back to the night before, when Hermione found out about his little 'habit'.

Harry woke up in the middle of the night, as always. He didn't want to stay in the dormitory, so he decided to go down to the common room where he can be alone. Taking a seat on the couch, he stared at the glowing embers of what was left of the fire. Sitting there alone, he had nothing else to do but think. His thoughts wandered off onto different topics, but they always seemed to stop at the same one: Draco.

_Harry shook his head. He refused to think about Draco. But, the more he tried not to, the more he did. "The more I try to forget, the more I remember," he said quietly to himself. Pulling up his sleeve, he stared at his arm. Most of his cuts were healed now, seeing as he hasn't cut himself in about a week. "New record," Harry smirked, "too bad I have to break it."_

_Pulling out his razor, he started to make straight lines on his arm, away from his wrist. His wrist contained no cuts, for now. Placing the cold blade against his wrist, he started to write the words 'I love him.' Hermione chose that time to walk into the common room._

"_Harry! What are you doing?" She hurried over to him, and quickly pulled the razor from his grasp._

"_Hermione?" Harry was shocked to see her, "what are you doing here?"_

"_I forgot something down here…But that's not the point! What are you doing?" _

"_Nothing," Harry was too ashamed to look her in the eyes._

"_Oh, Harry. This is about Draco, isn't it?" Harry didn't answer. But Hermione already knew she was right. Muttering a spell that quickly cleaned and wrapped up Harry's new wounds, she sat down beside him and hugged him._

"_Things will get better, I promise…" she whispered into his ear, hugging him tightly. Harry couldn't do anything but give into her hug, and let himself get comforted._

Harry hated the person he's become. He glowered at the scars on his arms. He hated having to resort to that kind of thing. _But there really isn't anything else that works, _he thought to himself. _God, I'm pathetic._

Blaise and Hermione looked at each other, then looked at Harry. From the look of his face, he was having an emotional battle with himself. Blaise placed an arm on his shoulder; Harry looked up at him and Blaise gave him a small smile. "It's okay, Harry."

"Yeah," agreed Hermione, also giving Harry a warm smile. "Just let it all out, we're here for you."

Harry smiled at his friends, and let the tears that he was holding in fall. He hated the fact that he was weak. That he was constantly crying. That he couldn't get over Draco. That he had to result to causing himself physical pain to get rid of the emotional one. He hated who he was, the person that he's become. But at least he knew that he had two good friends to fall back on.


	15. Chapter 15

Ron walked to breakfast by himself; when he woke up, Harry was already gone. Turning a corner, he bumped into someone.

"Why don't you watch where you're going?" asked an angry voice. Ron looked up to see who it was.

"Oh, Blaise, hey. Sorry about that."

"Yeah, whatever, Weasley." Blaise replied in a cold voice. He walked forward, shoving Ron in the process.

"Hey!" Ron shouted at Blaise's back. Blaise stopped walking and looked back at Ron. "Why are you such an ass to me?"

"Why do you care?" Blaise asked, glaring at Ron.

"You and Draco are friends. I've managed to get along with Crabbe and Goyle, why can't we get along too?"

"Because, Weasley, Crabbe and Goyle are idiots; they'll do anything Draco says. And, as for me, well, I hate you."

"What?" Blaise's words shocked Ron. "Why?"

"Do I really need a reason to hate you?"

"Well, hating someone for no reason is pretty stupid!"

"You calling me stupid?" Blaise took a step closer to Ron; there was a dangerous edge in his voice. Ron took a step back, scared of what Blaise could do to him. Blaise was trying hard not to laugh; he really wasn't going to do anything to Ron. He just liked to see Ron scared.

"N-no," Ron stuttered.

"You're pathetic, Weasley." Blaise smirked."And, I do have a reason to hate you."

"What is it?"

"Like I'm going to tell you?"

"What?" Ron was confused. Blaise just rolled his eyes at Ron and left. Ron watched Blaise walk away, not sure what just happened.

--

"Hey guys. I didn't see you this morning," Ron said to Hermione and Harry as he took a seat across from them. Harry continued to look at the Daily Prophet, pretending to be interested in an article; Hermione glanced at Ron shortly before returning to her book.

"Okay?" Ron finally noticed his friends' strange behavior towards him. He tried to talk to them, but every time he did, they found a reason to get away from him. Ron sighed and started to eat his breakfast.

--

"Are you okay?" Draco asked Ron as they walked to class together.

"I guess," Ron shrugged.

"What's wrong?" Draco placed an arm around Ron's shoulders. Ron sighed and told him about his confrontation with Blaise earlier, and what's been happening with Harry and Hermione.

"I'll talk to Blaise,"

--

"What's wrong with you?" Draco asked Blaise, who was sitting on his bed, reading a book. Blaise and Draco were the only ones in the room.

"Why do I get a sudden feeling of déjà vu?" asked Blaise with a small laugh.

"Shut up," Draco snarled.

"Okay, first you ask me a question, now you're telling me to shut up? Make up your mind, Draco."

"Stop being an ass, Blaise. Ron told me what happened this morning."

"What? Is he that pathetic that he has to run to you every time something goes wrong?" Blaise scoffed.

"What's your problem?"

"I don't have one. You're the one with the problem!"

"What's my problem?" Draco asked.

"The way your treating Harry! You have no right to treat him like that!" Blaise started to shout.

"Treat him like what? I haven't been talking to him at all since the break up!" Draco shouted back.

"You and Wealsey! What were you thinking asking out his friend? It's killing him!"

"He doesn't care! He told Ron that it was okay for him to go out with me."

"How do you know?" Blaise stopped shouting. "Like you said, you haven't talked to him since the break up. So how would you know that he's okay with all of this?"

"He told Ron!"

"So? Did he ever occur to you that he could lie?"

"He wouldn't lie to his best friend."

"He would if his best friend was in love with the same guy that he was."

"What?" Draco was shocked. "Harry doesn't love me!"

Blaise sighed. "How would you know?"

"I just do! And…how do you know this?"

"I just do," Blaise replied, repeated Draco's words.

"You're lying! You just don't want me going out with Weasley!"

"I don't want you going out with Weasley, but I'm not lying," Blaise tried to remain calm, "You have no idea how hurt Harry is by all of this. Break it off with Weasley, Draco. Nothing good is going to come from it; everyone will only get hurt."

"No one will get hurt!" Draco was having a hard time believing what Blaise was saying.

"They're already getting hurt." Blaise sighed. "Harry is hurt, Draco. More than you'll ever know. I've never seen him like this. Hermione is upset because of what's going on with Harry, and so am I. Ron is starting to get hurt because Harry and Hermione are giving him the cold shoulder. Their friendship is falling apart because of all of this. You have to end it."

"Ron is only hurting because you're being an ass to him. And he'll work this out with his friends; their friendship won't fall apart. Harry isn't hurt. I see him everyday; he doesn't look hurt. Granger is just being nosey. And you, I don't what's up with you. But I highly doubt that you'd be upset because of Potter."

Blaise sighed once more. "You really are stupid, aren't you, Draco?" Draco glared at him but he ignored it. "How dense can you be? Harry looks okay, but that doesn't mean he feels okay. If you keep up your relationship with Weasley, that friendship will be gone forever. Harry refuses to even talk about Ron, and Hermione is pissed beyond words at him. If you keep this up, who knows what will happen. You can't keep leading Ron on. He deserves someone who will love him back. And, who knows what will happen to Harry is this keeps up?"

"Just butt out, Blaise. I know what I'm doing!" Draco glared at Blaise once more before walking out of the room.

"No, Draco, you don't," Blaise said, but Draco was already out of the room. Blaise shook his head and lay back down on his bed, fearing what might happen if Draco keeps this up.

Author's Note: Yay! Another chapter done! Haha. Review and tell me what you think! I got over a hundred reviews! Yay! I'm so happy! Hehehehe. Well, tell me what you think.


	16. Chapter 16

"Hermione!" Blaise called, catching up with his friend on their way to class. "Where's Harry?"

"Oh, hey Blaise." Hermione greeted. "I don't know where he is. I waited for him this morning but he never came down from the dorms. I thought he went to breakfast early but he wasn't there either."

"Maybe he decided to skip breakfast again and go to class early?" Blaise suggested.

"Maybe…" The two walked into their first class, which they had together, and looked around hoping to find their friend. They could not find him anywhere.

"He's not here," Hermione said quietly, "I wonder where he is."

"He's probably just running a little late. He probably overslept of something."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Hermione and Blaise quickly took their seats and waited for the class to begin. Every time the door opened, they looked up to see who it was, but it was never Harry. He did not show up to class.

"Where is he?" Hermione asked during lunch. "I haven't seen him all day!"

"Yeah," agreed Blaise, looking solemn. He suddenly remembered his last conversation with Harry. It was last night. They were conversing through some magical parchment. Everything one person wrote could easily be read by whoever had the matching parchment. A/N: hope you get what I mean. Because I confused myself just writing that.

-Harry and Blaise's Conversation-

Harry is italicized, Blaise is normal font

_I can't take this anymore. It's just too much._

What's wrong? You're still not thinking about this whole Draco-is-dating-my-so-called-best-friend thing, are you? If you ask me, you're so much better off without Draco.

But, I can't help it! And all of this is driving me crazy because I want to get over him. I REALLY DO. It's just so hard for me. I can't believe Ron! Every part of me wants to hate him for doing this to me. I feel like he stabbed me in the back…but I REFUSE to hate him. He's still my best friend.

I don't know why you're still friends with that Weasel. But, you just need a little help getting over Draco. How about you start dating again? There are a lot of guys out there that won't mind going out with you…

But, I don't want to go out with anyone right now. I can't go out with someone knowing that I still love Draco. I couldn't do that to anyone; I can't make them be in a relationship where they aren't even being completely loved. No one deserves that.

Yeah, no one deserves that. But you don't deserve to be hurting like this. You deserve so much more than Draco.

But I don't want anyone else. Man, this is killing me, like…seriously… 

Huh? What do you mean? You didn't cut yourself again, did you?"

Nope. Not yet, anyway. Maybe later. The other guys are still awake… 

Harry, please don't. Cutting yourself isn't going to solve anything.

-sigh- I know, but it sure makes me feel a lot better. And, I don't know anymore, Blaise. I want to die.

Don't talk like that! You aren't going to die. Harry, please?

I'm sorry… But, I don't really know. I can't take this anymore. Maybe things will be better if I just die…

No! Things will get better. I promise. Maybe not anytime soon, but eventually… You just have to wait it out.

I'm tired of waiting. And it's not like anyone is going to miss me. Voldemort is gone now; no one needs me anymore And no one cares about me. They won't care if I die or not. I have no one….

Don't talk like that. You still have Hermione and me. We care about you. And we don't want you to die.

But, what's the point in living anyway? My life is worthless. I'll be doing everyone a favor by killing myself off.

No! Harry, please? Don't talk like that. Don't die.

I don't know…I really don't. But one thing I know for sure…I want to die… 

No you don'! It'll all get better, Harry. I promise. You just have to wait for it. And if you kill yourself, you'll never get to see how much better things will get…

I…just don't know. I'm going to go now. Thanks for everything, Blaise; you're the best. Take care of yourself, all right? And Hermione, too. Look out for her…

NO! Harry! Wait! Don't go yet…

-End Conversation-

Harry never answered him. Blaise was up most of the night worrying about his friend. His worry grew even more when his friend didn't show up that morning. Nothing happened to him. Blaise thought to himself as he started his lunch. If anything happened, news would've been all over school by now. But still, he was worried.

Author's Note: Hah! I finally got another chapter done! I've been busy with school and all that. And final exams are next week. So the next few chapters might take a while. So…you know the drill, review and tell me what you think. Suggestions are welcome. Oh! And tell me if you want this to be a Harry/Blaise or Harry/Draco. I'm undecided now…so I'll let the readers choose! Haha. Thanks to everyone who's been reading…and for those who've been waiting for the next chap, here you go! Hope you like! Review!


	17. Chapter 17

"Ron, have you see Harry?" Blaise asked as he walked to his next class. Draco stood beside Ron, but Blaise ignored him.

"Uhm, no, not since this morning, why?" Ron asked, clearly confused.

"I haven't seen him today, and since you guys stay in the same dorm room, I thought maybe you've seen him?"

Draco raised an eyebrow in Blaise's direction. He could see that Blaise was really worried about Harry. This angered him.

"Sorry, no. When I woke up this morning, he was still asleep. And when I left for breakfast, he was just getting up."

"Oh, alright. Thanks anyway," said Blaise, walking away from the two.

"That was weird," commented Draco.

"What was so weird about that?" Ron turned to Draco and looked at him questioningly.

"Well, Blaise…He and Harry seem to be getting pretty close,"

"Yeah, I noticed that, too. Do you think they're going out?"

Draco nearly tripped over his own feet. "What makes you say that?"

"They're always together and always talking and stuff."

"Yeah, but Granger is with them, too." Draco reasoned.

"I know, but when Hermione isn't with them, they're ALWAYS together. The only time I don't see them together is when Harry's in the common room, or when they're at their own separate tables when its time to eat."

Draco did not say anything. He thought about this for a while and realized that Ron was right.

"Draco, what's wrong?" Ron asked noticing a sudden change in his boyfriend's behavior.

"Huh? Nothing. Why do you ask?"

"You seem a little out of it. And you look mad…"

"It's nothing. Don't worry about it." The two hurried to class without saying anything else.

---

"Still no sign of Harry?" Blaise asked Hermione as they walked to dinner together.

"No," replied Hermione, "I asked the other guys about him but they all said that they haven't seen him since this morning, and when they went into the dorms, the curtain was closed around his bed. Maybe he was just sick."

"Yeah, maybe." But Blaise's thoughts were elsewhere. He did not tell Hermione about his conversation with Harry because he did not want to scare her. He decided not to tell her until he knows for sure that something happened to Harry. _There's no point in worrying her over nothing,_ he thought to himself.

After dinner, Hermione and Blaise went to their respective common rooms. Hermione looked around and spotted Dean. "Hey Dean, have you seen Harry?"

"I was up at the boys' dorm a couple minutes ago. The curtain is still drawn around his bed, he's been there all day."

"Do you know if he's sick or not?"

"No, sorry. I tried to talk to him, all the guys did, but he never answered."

"I wonder what gotten to him…" Hermione said to herself.

In the boys' dorm of the Slytherin house, Blaise sat on his bed, trying to calm himself down. He could not stop thinking about his conversation with Harry. He was trying desperately to get himself to relax, but no such luck. Feelings of guilt welled up inside of him. He was feeling guilty thinking that Harry had done something, but he was not able to stop him. Opening his trunk, he quickly pulled out his "two-way" parchment and tried to contact Harry.

-Conversation-

Harry? Are you there?

Please answer…

_Yeah, I'm here._

Oh! Thank god. I thought something had happened to you. I was worried about you.

_Huh? Why were you worried?_

Because, I thought something happened to you. I was scared that you tried to take your life or something.

_Why would you care?_

I care about you. You're my friend.

_Oh…_

So are you okay?

I guess… 

You didn't do anything to yourself, did you? I mean, you're still alive, so nothing happened, right?

I wouldn't say that. Damn. I was SO close. But at the last minute, I chickened out. God, I hate myself. I'm such a fag.

No you're not! Don't say that.

_Okay then…_

So, if you're okay, why didn't you go to class today? Hermione and me were worried sick about you.

Why? 

Why what? Why were we worried?

Yeah

Because you're our friend. And believe it or not, Potter, we care about you.

Haha. You guys are the best.

Thanks. So what happened to you today?

I didn't feel like going to class. I didn't really want to be around too many people.

Oh, will you be in class tomorrow?

Yeah.

Hey, I'm going to go to sleep, alright? I'm so damn tired. I didn't get much sleep, and I feel so weak.

Oh, okay. Take care of yourself. I'll see you tomorrow.

-End Conversation-

"Well, at least he's alive," Blaise said aloud.

"At lease who's alive?" Draco asked, walking to his bed, which was beside Blaise's.

"No one," Blaise replied.

Draco raised an eyebrow. Earlier today, his friend seems panicked and worried, now he seemed happy. "What's up with you?"

"Nothing," Blaise yawned. "I'm going to sleep. Night." Blaise pulled the curtains around his bed close, leaving Draco confused.


	18. Chapter 18

Harry stared at his reflection in the full-length mirror. There were circles under his eyes; he hasn't been sleeping well for a while. He also looked paler than usual, his eyes looked lifeless. He took off his shirt and took a look at himself. He could easily count every one of his ribs; proof that he has not been eating much. Harry looked straight; it was like looking at another person. He could barely recognize himself.

Harry glared at himself, hating what he saw. _I hate myself,_ he thought to himself. Pulling out a brand new razor from his pocket. He felt the cool blade against his stomach and a shiver went down his spine. Harry made a small cut on his stomach. He winced slightly, but got quickly got accustomed to the pain and started making more cuts. After making a few cuts on his stomach, he started to cut his wrist. He went over his old cuts; not all of them were fully healed. Blood seeped from the wounds on his stomach and from his wrist. His dark red blood a contrast to his deathly pale skin.

His thoughts suddenly drifted off and he was thinking back to earlier that day…

Flashback

"Hey, do you mind if I ask you a question?" Blaise asked Harry. The two were sitting by the lake again. Hermione was at the library finishing up some homework.

"_Sure. What is it?" Harry looked at Blaise._

"_Why do you cut yourself?" Blaise was eyeing the fresh wounds on Harry's arm. "I mean I know your depressed and all, what with the whole Draco situation. But, why cut yourself? Isn't there a better way?"_

"_I…don't really know." Harry said quietly._

"_Then, why don't you stop?"_

"_I've tried," Harry looked down at his arm. He looked angry and somewhat disgusted at seeing those scars. "It's hard. Nothing else makes me feel better."_

"_But, hurting yourself isn't the right way to deal with this."_

"_I know, but…it's a last resort."_

"_There's got to be a better way. Why don't you just talk to Draco?"_

"_He doesn't want to talk to me."_

"_You don't know that. Harry, cutting yourself isn't doing anything. You're hurting yourself for nothing! Draco isn't even worth it."_

"_He is to me, Blaise. He is to me."_

"_But, it's just not right to cut yourself." Blaise sighed. They've gone over this many times before. "Hermione worries about your all the time, and I do, too. I hate seeing you cut yourself. I hate to see you hurt, and it hurts me seeing you do this to yourself."_

_A small smile appeared on Harry's lips. "Thanks for caring, Blaise. But really, I'll be fine."_

"_You're cutting yourself, that isn't fine."_

"_But, it helps ease the pain."_

"_I don't see how hurting yourself helps you deal with the pain."_

"_It's complicated. You won't understand it unless you go through what I'm going through right now – and I hope you never have to go through it."_

"_But, will you try to stop? For me and Hermione at least?"_

"_I can't make a make a promise that I know I can't keep." Harry looked away from Blaise._

"_Well, won't you at least try? It's really hurting me and 'Mione to see you do this to yourself."_

"_Ok," Harry finally gave in. "I'll try to stop, ok?"_

"_Great," Blaise seemed really happy to hear that. "But, will you promise me something?"_

"_Depends. What is it?"_

"_Promise you will never try to kill yourself? I know you think there's nothing left since Draco left you. But trust me, things will get better. You have me and Hermione. We care about you. And we hate to see you hurt so much."_

_Harry could hear the sincerity in his voice. It made him smile again. "I don't know what I'd do without you guys."_

"_So…you promise?" _

"_Yeah, I do."_

"_Great!" Blaise grinned at Harry, who grinned back._

End Flashback

Harry sat on the floor, leaning on his bed. He had started to feel giddy, and became too weak to keep standing up. His blood had started to fall to the floor, making a dark puddle.

"Shit," Harry mumbled to himself, knowing that his roommates would see that when they came in. He picked up his wand to clean it up, but was too weak to hold it up. "Screw it."

Everything blurred, and for a few seconds, everything turned black before everything when back to being blurry.

"I'm so sorry Blaise," Harry whispered as consciousness slipped away.

Author's note: it's been a while since I updated. But here it is! Another chapter! For all those I kept waiting, I'm sorry! I had major writer's block on this one. And if you're still reading this, thank you! I love you guys! Hehe. Anyway, hope you like. REVIEW.


	19. Chapter 19

"So, I'll just see you at breakfast," Draco said as he and Ron approached the portrait hole.

"Yeah, bye." Ron smiled and gave him a peck on the lips. He remained outside the portrait hole and watched Draco walk away. Entering the Gryffindor common room, he looked around and spotted Hermione on one of the couches. He was about to go and sit with her but thought against it.

He walked up the stairs and to the boys' dorms. He was shocked to find that the door was locked. He knocked on the door to see if whoever was in the dorm room could open it. "Hey," he called out, "open up!"

When no one answered the door, he pulled out his wand and cast a spell to unlock the door. His first few spells did not do anything, but he managed to get it open after a while. He took one step into the room and froze in place. The sight that he saw once he opened the door was shocking.

He saw Harry, leaning on his bed. His skin seemed paler than ever, and there seemed to be a soft glow surrounding him. But what scared Ron the most was that blood was everywhere. Dark red stains were all over Harry's clothes and the end of the sheets of his bed, and Harry was lying, motionless, in a puddle of his own blood.

"Harry!" Ron's senses finally came back to him and he rushed to his friend's side and knelt down beside him, not caring that he was getting his clothes bloody. "Harry!"

Harry was feeling faint. He was too weak to keep his eyes open for too long. He could hear someone calling his name, but it seemed so far away. Soon enough, he lost consciousness.

Hermione rushed up the stairs to the boys' dorms when she heard Ron calling Harry's name. The rest of the boys hurried up to the dorm as well. Everyone else in the common room decided to stay there and wait to see what happened.

Hermione and the boys arrived at the door the same time and all looked in. It was if they were rooted to the ground and they lost control of their bodies. They couldn't move or speak a word.

"HARRY!" Hermione was the first to get her senses back. She rushed over to where Ron was. This caused the boys to get a hold of their senses. Dean went to get Professor Mcgonagall. The rest of the boys remained by the door, leaving the three friends by themselves.

Dean rushed back with the professor who also became frozen with shock. But she got over hers after a second and pulled out her wand to teleport Harry to the hospital wing.

"You two can go to the hospital wing and we'll talk there." she said to Hermione and Ron. "You can call Mr. Zabini and tell him to meet you there as well."

Hermione wiped tears from her eyes and sent a message to Blaise. She and Ron walked to the infirmary together. There was a tense silence surrounding them. Ron was the first to break the silence. "I can't believe he did that."

"I can," Hermione said solemnly.

"You could?" Ron's eyes widened. "How? Why? What?"

Hermione stopped walking and Ron stood beside her. "He cuts himself."

"What? Why didn't you stop him?" Ron said frantically.

"You don't think we tried?" She glared at Ron and tears formed in her eyes once more. "Me and Blaise are always here for him doing everything we can to make sure Harry was okay! But, there's nothing we could do to help him this time. We can't help him if he doesn't want to help himself. But me and Blaise are still there for him. He's our friend and we care about him."

Hermione suddenly burst into tears. Ron didn't know what to do, so he placed his arms around her and hugged her tightly. She just cried into his shoulder.

"Hermione!" Blaise called, walking up to them. He had been running and was out of breath. "What happened?"

Hermione left Ron's embrace and went to Blaise. "Oh, Blaise. I can't believe it!" She choked on a sob. Placed wrapped his arms around her and tried to comfort her as she cried.

"What's wrong?"

"It's Harry…" Hermione whispered. The color drained from Blaise's face. He knew what happened just by hearing her say it was Harry.

"Where is he?" Blaise's voice cracked. He was fighting the tears that were threatening to fall.

"In the hospital wing," said Ron. "Let's go see how he's doing."

Hermione dried her eyes and the three of them headed to the hospital wing.

---

"Do you know what could've possessed him to do this?" Madam Promfrey asked them.

Ron shook his head slowly. Hermione and Blaise glanced at each other before Blaise spoke up. "Well, Hermione and me knew that he cut himself and we tried to get him to stop. And he did."

"When did you get him to stop?" Madam Promfrey asked.

"Last week. He hasn't cut himself since." Blaise lied.

"Is this true Ms. Granger?"

"Y-yes," she stammered, deciding to follow Blaise's lead.

"But, why did he cut himself?" Madam Promfrey asked. "What cause him to do that?"

"He never told us," Blaise said, looking down at the ground. "Whenever we tried to talk to him about it, he just said that it was complicated and we probably wouldn't understand."

"How is he doing?" Hermione asked.

"He's fine," answered Madam Promfrey. "I managed to stop the bleeding and his wounds have started to heal. But, he did lose quite a lot of blood. I gave him something that should help him with that. You can go see him if you like,"

"Ok." Blaise, Hermione, and Ron rushed in to see Harry.

Author's Note: Another chapter done! Glad to see you people still like my story. Hehe.. Leave a review and tell me what you think. I'm going to try to get another chapter in as soon as possible.


	20. Chapter 20

Draco stood outside the Great Hall, looking at his watch every five minutes. He was waiting for Ron to show up, but he wasn't coming. He was getting tired of waiting. He spotted Neville walking with some more boys from Gryffindor. "Hey, Longbottom, have you seen Ron?"

"I don't know. He never came back from the infirmary last night," Neville answered. Draco was about to ask why Ron was in the infirmary, but Neville was already inside.

"What the hell happened last night?" Draco asked himself as he walked into the Great Hall alone. At the Slytherin table, Draco noticed that Blaise wasn't there as well.

"Where's Blaise?" he asked Crabbe.

"Dunno," Crabbe replied. "He left the dorm last night and that was the last time we saw him."

"He didn't come back?" Draco raised an eyebrow.

"Don't think so. He wasn't there this morning, either."

_That's odd,_ thought Draco. _I wonder what happened to him…and to Ron…_

Draco didn't see Ron or Blaise at all that morning. He also noticed that Hermione and Harry weren't there either. All the Slytherins had no idea what happened to Blaise, and when he tried asking some of the Gryffindors, they either ignored him, or refused to give him an answer. The other houses were oblivious.

Ron, Hermione, and Blaise finally showed up during lunch. The looks on their somber faces clearly said that it was bad news; no one wanted to ask questions. Blaise's face was pretty emotionless, but his eyes were bloodshot, and it looked like he had spent most of the night in tears. In fact, all three of them looked like they had been crying a lot that night. Ron was disheveled – they all were – and all three of them seemed to be lost in their own thoughts. Hermione looked like she was having a hard time holding the tears in and that she could break down in any minute.

"What happened to you?" Draco asked when Blaise reached the Slytherin table. Blaise looked up at him for a second, before turning away and starting on his lunch. He ignored everyone for the rest of the meal. _I'll just ask Ron what happened,_ he thought to himself.

--

"What's wrong?" Draco asked as he and Ron walked to their class. "Where were you all morning?"

"I was in the infirmary with Hermione and Blaise," Ron answered.

"What were you doing in there?"

Draco noticed tears starting to form in Ron's eyes before he answered, "It's Harry. God, Draco. That was so scary."

"What was scary? What happened?" There was a slight panic in Draco's voice, but Ron didn't seem to notice.

"He – god Draco. I didn't know what do to."

"What's wrong, Ron?" Draco placed an arm around Ron's shoulders, trying to calm him down. The redhead had started to cry.

"Last night, I walked into the dorm and saw Harry." Ron started to shake slightly, "all the blood. I was so scared,"

"What?" Draco grew paler. "What happened?"

"When I walked in, I saw Harry. He was sitting on the floor. At first, I thought he was just asleep or something. He was so quiet and he wasn't moving. But then, I saw…" Ron choked on a sob. "Blood. I saw blood, Draco. All around Harry. I was so scared; I didn't know what to do. I couldn't move."

"Wh-what?" Draco stammered, having a hard time comprehending what Ron just told him.

"Harry, he-he…he tried to commit suicide!" Ron finally broke down and cried after getting those words out. Draco's mouth opened and closed, but no sound came out; he was in shock. Ron cried into Draco's shoulder. Draco just stood there with one arm holding Ron lightly around the waist and the other patting him gently on the back. His mind, however, was not on the boy he held in his arms. It was on Harry. Students passed by the two boys, giving them strange looks, but they didn't notice. Ron was too upset to care, and Draco was too shocked to notice.

"Ron," Draco said softly, once he regained his composure. "Let's go, we're going to be late for class." Ron, wiping tears from his eyes, let Draco lead him to class.

--

"How is he doing?" Dumbledore asked Madame Promfrey.

"Well, I managed to close up all of his wounds and they're almost completely healed,"

"That's a good thing, isn't it?"

"Yes, but there's one problem…"

"What is it?" Dumbledore stared at the pale boy lying down in the bed before him.

"His body is refusing to wake up."

"What? How is that possible?"

"I'm not quite sure myself. He's fine, physically, but I can't say the same about his emotional state. Whatever made him attempt suicide, it's stopping him from waking up."

"I don't think I follow you," Dumbledore switched his attention from Harry to Madame Promfrey.

"I don't fully understand it either. But, to put it one way, Harry has lost the will to live. I performed all the spells and gave him the all the potions he needed. He should have woken up by now…"

"But he didn't, because while his body is fine, his subconscious is still telling him to die." Dumbledore finished for her. Madame Promfrey nodded solemnly, trying to stop the tears that have formed in her eyes.

"What could have caused him to do this?" Dumbledore wondered out loud.

Author's Note: Another chapter done! Hope you guys like it. And I hope this doesn't confuse anyone. If you have any questions, feel free to ask. Review!


	21. Chapter 21

Blaise and Hermione sat by Harry's bed, not saying anything as they watched their friend sleep. Harry had been in there for almost a week now, and he still hasn't woken up. Blaise looked up at the soft sound of crying. He moved his seat closer to Hermione and put an arm around her. "Hermione, are you okay?"

"Y-yeah," she stammered, "I just…I don't know, Blaise. Will he ever wake up?"

"I don't know, 'Mione. I really don't know," Blaise shook his head, hugging Hermione tighter as the tears came down even more. "You heard what Madame Promfrey said, if Harry will wake up when he wants to wake up."

"But, what if he doesn't want to wake up? What happens then? They said he can't stay asleep forever. If he doesn't wake up, he'll die."

"Don't talk like that, 'Mione. There's still hope, Harry's still deciding. If he wanted to die, he would have died already. Right now, he's still deciding whether he wants to die or not. So as long as he's still sleeping, there's still hope that he'll live."

"I guess you're right,"

--

"Hey," Draco greeted Ron. "Where are you headed?"

"To the hospital. I want to see how long Harry's doing."

"I'll follow you," said Draco, secretly wanting to see Harry. "Why hasn't Harry woken up yet anyway?"

"I don't know," Ron shrugged. "Madame Promfrey said that it's because he doesn't want to wake up."

"Huh?"

"Harry's body is in pretty good condition now, especially after being in the hospital for about a week. But, he wanted to die, and they think that he still does, so that's why he won't wake up."

"Why did he try to commit suicide anyway?" Draco felt a sharp pang in his heart at the thought of Harry killing himself, but chose to dismiss it.

"I don't know. I asked Blaise and Hermione but they say they don't know either." Ron took a short pause before continuing. "But then, I think they do know, they're just not telling anyone."

"What makes you say that?"

"I don't know. It's just a feeling. But I think they really do know what happened with Harry."

"That's weird…" Draco said softly. Ron didn't say anything but nodded his head in agreement. The rest of their walk to the hospital was in silence, each boy lost in their own thoughts.

--

Blaise looked up at the sound of the door opening. His eyes widened with shock before becoming a glare. "What are you guys doing here?" he said venomously to Ron and Draco who just entered the room, but his question was pointed mostly to Draco. "You have no reason to be here."

"Ron wanted to see his friend, so I came with him," Draco replied in a cold, yet surprisingly calm, voice.

"You don't have to follow him everywhere he goes. That boyfriend of yours is perfectly capable of taking care of himself."

"I don't have to, but I _want_ to. There's nothing wrong with that."

"Blaise," Hermione placed a hand on Blaise's shoulder, "just leave them. And, we have to go get something to eat, so let's go grab some lunch."

"Fine," Blaise said reluctantly.

Draco watched the two walk out of the room before taking a seat next to Ron. Countless thoughts were running through his mind; he think straight. He just sat there and watched Ron. Ron was talking softly to Harry. "How could you do this, mate? I never thought you would be the type to do that to yourself."

_He's right, Harry._ Draco thought to himself. _I think I know you well enough to know that you aren't like that. You would never result to hurting yourself – let alone killing yourself. What caused you to do this?_

_Because of you, you idiot,_ a voice in Draco's head spoke up.

_What?_

_It's all your fault he's like that. He was never like that before. _

_It can't be because of me,_ Draco thought.

_Yes it is, _the voice argued.

_No its not._

_Yes it is._

_No its not._

_  
Yes it is._

_  
NO. It's not!_

_YES IT IS!_

"No its not!" Draco shouted out loud. Ron looked at Draco, shock all over his face.

"What the hell, Draco?" Blaise asked, walking back into the room.

"Huh?" Draco asked, not realizing that he had shouted the last one out loud.

"Who the hell are you talking to?" Blaise raised an eyebrow and looked at him suspiciously.

"Uhh... No one. What are you doing here?" Draco quickly changed the subject. "I thought you were going to get something to eat?"

"I left my wand in here," Blaise shrugged, picking up the wand on the bedside table.

"Oh, okay." Draco replied, looking back down at Harry's pale body on the bed. _What the hell happened to you? _He thought to himself.

"Draco, I'm going back to my common room, okay?" Ron said quietly.

"Okay." Draco watched Ron leave the room before turning back to Harry.

"What are you still doing here?" Blaise stopped at the door and turned to Draco.

"What?"

"You dumped Harry. And then went out with his best friend." Blaise pointed out.

"What's your point, Zabini?" Draco asked, anger lacing his voice.

"My point is, why do you care if Harry's here in the hospital? You made it seem like you didn't give a damn about him anymore."

"I still care about him." Draco said softly.

"Yeah, of course you do." Blaise said, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

"I do!" Draco retorted.

"Then why'd you do this to him?"

"Do what to him? I didn't drive him to do this, did I?" Blaise could see the fear in Draco's eyes as he said this.

"I don't know, Draco. Why don't you tell me?" Draco said before walking out of the room.

"Is this…my fault?" Draco whispered into the empty room.

Author's Note: Another chapter done! Sorry it took forever. I had serious writer's block and I lost the flashdrive where I saved all my stuff p. Lol. Thanks to everyone who read it and reviewed! I'm really sorry for making you wait so long! Review and tell me what you think. I'll try to update more often now.


	22. Chapter 22

Harry looked around him, trying to make out where he was, but he could barely see. He was standing in the middle of nowhere with fog surrounding him, obscuring his vision. _Where am I?_ He thought to himself. He took a few steps forward, his steps a little awkward. Everything seemed the same. No matter where he looked, it was the same vast expanse of unfamiliar land.

Harry stopped and listened. He could faintly hear a soft murmuring, like something talking. But he could not make out the words, nor could he figure out whose voice it was he heard. But something told him that he knew the person who was talking. He looked around frantically; trying to find the direction the voice was coming from.

"Harry," Draco looked down at the pale figure lying on the bed. "I'm so sorry. Please. Wake up."

Harry didn't stir. He remained still on the bed, unmoving. He moved so little it almost seemed like he wasn't breathing. Draco gently placed his hand on Harry's face, cupping his cheek. A sad smile appeared on Draco's face and tears started to form in his eyes. "I love you, Harry. Please wake up."

Harry looked around. The soft murmuring had become clearer. "I'm so sorry. Please. Wake up."

The words confused him. _Why are they telling me to wake up? I'm already awake. And, who is that? He sounds so familiar. I just can't remember who it is._

"I love you, Harry. Please wake up."

"Huh?" Harry turned around, desperate to find whoever was talking. _Draco?_ He thought._ No, it can't be. It can't be him. He doesn't love me anymore. He NEVER loved me._

"Where the hell am I?" Harry asked out loud. The only thing that answered him was silence.

Ron walked out of the Great Hall, unable to find Draco anywhere. He had looked everywhere he thought Draco would be and even talked to some of the Slytherins. He was nowhere in sight. Neither was Hermione. He had seen her go off with Blaise Zabini earlier but had no idea where she was right now.

After wandering around the castle by himself for a while, he decided to go visit Harry and see if he was any better. He stopped when he saw someone by Harry's bed. Upon closer inspection, he saw that it was Draco. Ron inched forward. Draco did not seem to notice that he was there. Ron was shocked to find tears in Draco's eyes.

"Draco?" He said softly.

Draco jumped slightly when he heard Ron's voice. He hurriedly wiped away the tears. He faced away from Ron, hoping that he hadn't seen the tears. "Hey, Ron."

"What are you doing in here?" Ron asked, moving closer to Draco and taking his hand. He noticed how Draco left his hand still and didn't hold Ron's hand back. He also noticed how Draco was trying his best to hide his face and what's left of the tears.

"Nothing," Draco replied, his voice a little shaky. "I was passing by and just thought I'd see how Harry was doing."

"I've been looking for you all day, were you here all this time?" Ron asked, suspicion forming in his eyes.

"No," Draco lied. Ron could tell he was lying.

"Don't lie to me, Draco," Ron pulled Draco's hand and forced him to face him. "What were you doing in here all day? And why were you crying?"

Draco let go of Ron's hand and tried to come up with and excuse. But nothing came to mind. He glanced down and Harry still asleep on the bed and decided to tell Ron the truth. "Ron, I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?"

"This…this… relationship. It just isn't going to work."

"W-why not?" Ron stammered. His voice started to sound choked with tears.

Draco couldn't look him in the eyes. "Ron, I'm really sorry. I tried to make myself love you, to return all those feelings you've had for me. But I just can't. My heart belongs to Harry and no one else. I really did try to love you, Ron. I swear I did. I just…couldn't."

"What?" Ron couldn't believe his ears. "Then, why'd you break up with Harry? Why'd you ask me out? Why'd you do this?!"

"I'm really, Ron. You have every right to be angry or hate me or whatever," Draco stared at the floor, still unable to meet Ron's eyes. "I broke up with Harry because…" Draco paused, trying to come up with a reason. He sighed then continued. "Even I don't remember what my reason was for breaking up with him. I'm so stupid. But I asked you out because I wanted to move on. It was really screwing me over not being with Harry, and I thought being with someone else could help me take my mind off of all this. I picked you because you were probably the closest thing to Harry I could ever have. I thought that if I kept this up, I could learn to forget about Harry and learn to love you. But I really couldn't. And after what Harry did, I just couldn't keep this going anymore. I had to tell you. You didn't deserve this. I'm so sorry, Ron."

Ron's fists were clenched and Draco was so sure that he was about to punch him. He closed his eyes and waited for the blow. Nothing happened. Draco opened his eyes and faced Ron. Tears were in his eyes, but they held so much anger and hatred in them. His knuckles were white from being clenched so tight. Ron glared at him, and opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. He turned on his heel and quickly walked out of the room, slamming the door shut.

Harry was kneeling down on his knees, unable to believe what he heard. This voice had come back, and he heard everything that was said. He had made out Ron's voice, and because of the conversation he had heard, he was sure that the first voice really was Draco. _He still loves me?_

**A/N:** I'm back! Whoo! Hehe. Sorry it took so long. Thank you to everyone who reviewed. I'm SOOOOOOO sorry it took so long. And sorry this is so short. I'll try to get the next chapter up by next week. And it'll be a lot longer. Promise ) hehe. Thank you to all the readers who continue to read even though I haven't posted anything up in FOREVER. And for those that are telling me to hurry and update: here you go. Hope you like it. If all my old readers are STILL reading this story: THANK YOU SOOO MUCH hehe. Reviews are always welcome )


	23. Chapter 23

Draco was seated in a chair next to Harry's bed. He had been there since Ron left, almost two hours ago. Dinner was almost over. Draco wasn't in the mood to read. He lifted his arm and softly touched Harry's cheek. "Please wake up, Harry."

"What are you doing in here?" Draco looked up and saw Hermione and Blaise walking in through the door. Hermione moved to take the seat on the other side of Harry's bed and Blaise stood behind her. They both gave him questioning looks.

"I thought I'd come visit Harry," Draco replied softly, not looking up at them. He had moved his hand from Harry's face when they came in. The three sat in silence for a while, no one wanting to say anything. The tension in the room was so thick. The silence was finally broken by a soft moan from Harry.

"Harry!" Hermione exclaimed, getting up from her seat. Blaise rushed out of the room to get Madam Promfrey. Draco remained where he sat. His face had lit up, so happy that Harry was awake. He watched Harry turn his head a little, softly groaning in pain. He slowly opened his eyes, before quickly shutting them again. The light in the room was too bright. He blinked his eyes slowly, until his eyes adjusted to the light.

"Hermione?" he said hoarsely, not noticing Draco on his other side. Tears of joy filled Hermione's eyes.

"Oh Harry," Hermione choked out, "I'm so glad your awake!"

Harry gave her a weak smile. "Where's Blaise?" He turned his head and looked around for his other friend. That was when he spotted Draco. His eyes widened in surprise before he glared at the blonde slytherin. "What are you doing in here?"

"Draco, maybe it's better if you left," said Blaise, walking back into the room. Draco was about to say something but Madam Promfrey came into the room and interrupted him.

"Maybe its better if _all_ of you left," she said sternly, "it's getting late. And I want to look over Mr. Potter."

The three were about to argue with her but the look she gave them stopped everything they were going to say. The three left the room, looking back at Harry and waving goodbye as they did. Hermione left Draco and Blaise as she headed to the gryffindor common room. Draco and Blaise walked in silence to the slytherin common room.

"You never did answer that question," Blaise started, breaking the silence.

"What question?"

"Why were you in Harry's room?"

"I wanted to see him," Draco replied. There was silence for a while before Draco spoke again. "I broke up with Ron."

"What?" Blaise stopped walking and looked at Draco, who had stopped as well. "I thought you were 'madly in love' with him?"

"I was wrong." Draco replied. "I never did love him. I tried to, I really did."

Blaise remained silent and listened to Draco explain everything to him. "It was stupid of me to break up with Harry. What's even dumber was that I asked out Ron. I knew asking out Harry's best friend was wrong. I _knew_ but I still did it anyway. I'm so fucking stupid. I knew he'd be upset. But I still did it anyway. I hate myself! I asked out Ron and I tried to love him. I _honestly _tried. But I just couldn't. I love Harry and nothing is ever going to change that. I just hoped that being with Ron would help me forget Harry. But nothing could ever make me forget him. I just love him so much."

"So what happened with Ron?" Blaise finally asked. The two started walking again as Draco told him what happened earlier.

"He walked into the room and I was there. He asked what I was doing. And… I don't know. I just felt so guilty. I couldn't take it anymore. I told him everything – about how I still love Harry, how I tried to love him but couldn't, all of that stuff. He was so upset. I expected him to punch me and knock me out, but he didn't. He just stormed out of the room." Draco sighed. "I really screwed up."

"I can't argue with you there," said Blaise.

Hermione walked into the gryffindor common room and saw that Ron was the only one there. "Ron!" she practically skipped up to him. She was so happy that she forgot she was angry with Ron. "Harry's awake!"

"That's great," said Ron, looking up and giving her a sad smile.

"What's wrong?" Hermione asked, noticing that his eyes were puffy and red. He had just been crying.

"Draco broke up with me,"

"Oh Ron, I'm so sorry," Hermione sat down next to him and put a comforting arm around him shoulder. "Draco's a bastard. First Harry, now you. He was probably just out to get you guys or something."

"No. He really did love Harry. He still loves Harry."

"How do you know that?"

"He told me so himself. That's why he left me. He's still in love with Harry."

"Ron," Hermione paused and tried to think of something to say. "I'm sorry. I don't know what to say."

"Don't be sorry," Ron gave her another sad smile. "It isn't your fault. Harry and Draco are perfect together. I got too caught up in being with someone to actually realize that. I just hope that Draco isn't too late."

"What do you mean by too late?" Hermione asked.

"Draco broke up with him and asked out his best friend and pretty much rubbed it in his face. If that happened to me, I'd never forgive Draco. But I've been thinking about this for a while now. They really are meant to be. I just hope that Harry hasn't moved on yet."

"Where's all this coming from?"

"I don't know, Hermione. I really don't," Ron replied. "I just know that it was wrong for me to go out with Draco. Harry loved him so much and was so torn up because of it. I'm so stupid. And I suck as a best friend. I'm the scum of the earth."

"No you're not," Hermione replied. "I'm sure Harry will understand and forgive you. You two have been through so much together. And as for the Draco thing… You're right. Harry really did love Draco. And I think he still does. Or, I'm _sure_ he still does. But after what Draco did, Harry's afraid to get hurt again. I don't know if he'll ever fully recover from that hurt. I don't think he wants to open his heart anymore because he really doesn't want to get hurt."

"I know," Ron sighed. "But I hope he'll give Draco a second chance."

"You know," Hermione said with a small smile, "I actually expect you to throw some fit and plot your revenge against Malfoy. You're taking this quite maturely.

"We grow up at the strangest times?" Ron offered with a small laugh. "I know, I was so ready to punch Draco earlier. But I don't know. Something stopped me. I don't want to get some revenge. I hate him for what he did and all, but it's probably for the best."

"Okay, who are you and what have you done with the real Ron?"

Ron laughed. "You know what? I actually felt that Draco and me weren't right for a while now. I ignored it but after Harry got into the hospital, the feeling got stronger. Er, I don't know if I'm making any sense."

"I know that you're trying to say," said Hermione. "And I get you."

Harry lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. Madam Promfrey had finished looking over him and left him there with some food to eat, which he has still yet to touch. Draco had been in his room, and he had looked really upset. _What if what I heard wasn't just a dream? What if it was all real?_ _No._ He thought after a while. _It can't have been true. He doesn't love me. He never did. He has Ron now anyway. Why would he ever love me?_

He moved to lie on his side and pulled the blanket over him as tears started to form in his eyes. _He'll never love me._


	24. Chapter 24

Draco lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He tried to sleep but all that filled his mind was Harry. _I'll get him to forget me if it's the last thing I do,_ he thought to himself. He moved to lie on his side, pulling the blanket over his head. After a while, he moved to lay down on his other side.

"Damn it, Draco," Blaise said from across the room. "Quit moving around so much, you're making so much noise."

"Sorry," Draco mumbled, moving to lie back down and stare at the ceiling. He closed his eyes and tried to sleep. He opened them minutes later and sighed. He could not get to sleep.

"Ok," Said Blaise, sitting up in bed. "What's bothering you?"

"It's… this thing with Harry. It's killing me, Blaise."

"Well, it is your fault."

"Thanks for the sympathy," grumbled Draco.

"I'm sorry," Blaise apologized, "Its just that. It _is_ your fault. You chose to do this. Now you have to suffer the consequences."

"I know, I keep screwing up." Draco sighed again, and sat up. "I wonder how Ron is. I hope I haven't screwed him over, too."

"He's taking it quite well, actually." Blaise replied. He moved to turn on the lamp on his bedside table.

"How do you know?"

"I talked to Hermione earlier. She says that Ron is taking it quite well and maturely. He's actually being too mature that he's scaring Hermione." Blaise let out a small laugh.

"Really? I'd expect Ron to be pissed and after blood." Draco replied.

"He was angry at first. But then he realized you and Harry are meant to be together or something like hat. I don't know." Blaise shrugged. "I can't really remember what Hermione said."

"Oh. I hope Harry sees things like Ron does."

"Maybe he does," replied Blaise, trying to suppress a yawn. "But then, you really screwed over his thinking. No matter what the situation, Harry could always make it seem so negative or depressing."

"Really?" Draco sighed. "I really messed him up."

"Harry's a forgiving guy." Blaise lay down on his bed. "He probably will over time." Blaise yawned and closed his eyes. "Why don't you worry about it in the morning? Get some sleep."

"Alright. Good night, Blaise." Silence responded; Blaise had already fallen asleep.

"I swear I'll get you back, Harry." Draco whispered into the darkness before falling asleep himself.

"How long do I have to stay in here?" Harry asked, watching Madam Promphrey get some potions for him.

"You should be able to leave tomorrow. You're in good health," she replied, handing him a goblet. "For now just get some sleep."

"Ok," Harry drank everything inside it, making a face at the bitter taste. After handing her back the goblet, he pulled the covers over himself and closed his eyes, falling into a dreamless sleep.

At breakfast, Draco looked around, hoping to see a dark-haired gryffindor walk in.

"Would you relax, Draco?" said Blaise, who was seated next to him. "He'll be here. Just get something to eat and calm down."

"Fine," Draco mumbled, putting some bacon and eggs onto his plate. Blaise couldn't help but chuckle at his friend's antics.

The door opened, Draco's head quickly turned to see who had walked in. It was Harry. He looked healthy enough. Draco couldn't tell how he was feeling because his face was emotionless. As he walked into the room, all eyes fell on him. Everyone was shocked to see him. Whispers went around, people wondering what had happened to him. Draco ignored the whispering around him and watched Harry walk towards Hermione. Draco could barely make out the bandages on his wrist; most of it was covered by his robes. _He's really skinny now,_ Draco thought.

Harry walked up to Hermione, ignoring everyone around him. He took a seat besides her. She gave him a smile. He returned the smile and looked around, not really hungry. Ron was across from him.

"Hey Harry," he said with a smile.

"Hey," Harry replied weakly.

"How you feeling?"

"Better, thanks."

"Harry, I'm sorry about the whole Draco thing." Ron said quietly. He could tell that everyone around them was listening in on their conversation, but he really didn't care.

"It's okay, Ron. No hard feelings. We can't help who we fall in love with, right?" Harry replied. Ron thought he could detect a faint bitterness in his tone, but it was so emotionless that Ron couldn't tell.

"Harry, I don't know if you know this, but me and Draco broke up."

"Why?" That caught Harry's attention. "He really is a bastard, isn't he?"

"I don't know about that," Ron gave him a smile, "But I'm okay."

"Really?" Harry looked surprised.

"Yeah, really." Ron laughed. "Is that so hard to believe?"

"Sorry, Ron." Harry smiled at him. "Its just that you're usually the one who'd throw a fit at these kind of things."

"I know. It's odd. Oh well." Ron replied, taking a bite out of his breakfast. Harry gave a small laugh and grabbed something to eat. Hermione smiled at her two friends.

Note: Another chapter done! Tell me what you think. Love it? Hate it? All that stuff. Thanks for reading! Uhh.. Yeah. That's all I have to say. Hehe.


	25. Chapter 25

Draco stood up from his seat as he saw Harry leave the Great Hall. He hurried out to catch up with Harry so that he could talk to him. He walked out into the hallway and looked around, trying to see which way Harry went. He caught a glimpse of him turning somewhere so Draco ran to catch up with him.

"Harry!" Draco called when he was about ten feet from him. Harry stopped and turned around. Draco slowed to a walk when he saw Harry not walking anymore.

"What do you want?" Harry asked when Draco reached him.

"I just wanted to talk," Draco said in a breathy voice as he tried to catch his breath.

"We have nothing to talk about," Harry said with a slight glare. Draco visibly winced at the cold tone in Harry's voice.

"Harry," Draco started, "Please, just hear me out?"

"Draco, we have nothing to talk about." Harry repeated, starting to walk away. Draco was about to follow, but the glare Harry sent him stopped him in his tracks. "What happened between us is in the past now, buried under all the other shit we've done before. I can't erase everything we've been through, but I can keep it buried. And frankly, that's how I prefer it. Buried. As close to disappearing as I could possibly get."

"Harry, please…" Draco could feel tears starting to form in his eyes. The Harry he knew was never that cold. _I really did screw him over. Fuck, I screwed up big time._

"No. Draco, please. If there were even a small part of you that still cares about me, even just a little, you'd leave me alone. Please. You trying to talk to me like this, you even being near me… its not doing me any good Draco. I just got out of the hospital for a damn suicide attempt." Harry showed him his bandaged wrist to emphasize his point. "Please Draco. I'd rather not go through all of that again. Just… please… leave me alone."

Draco was rooted where he stood. He watched Harry walk away. He couldn't see the tears that had started streaming down Harry's face as he walked away. Draco watched him walk and suddenly remembered something.

"_Draco."_

_Draco looked down at the dark-haired boy in his arms. "Yeah, Harry?"_

"_I want you to promise me something."_

"_Sure, what is it, love?"_

"_I want you to promise that you'll never let me go, or just let me walk away from you as if you didn't matter to me. And if I ever did that, I want you to promise me that you'll come after me."_

"_I promise, Harry. But you have to promise the same thing to me."_

"_I promise, Draco." Harry looked up at him with a smile and lightly kissed him on the lips._

Tears started to fall from Draco's eyes as he continued to watch Harry walk away. "Do I still come after you?" he said softly.

Harry continued to walk, wiping the tears from his eyes. He could feel Draco's gaze on him as he walked. He wanted so badly to look back, to go back, but he wouldn't.

"You're not with him anymore, Harry," he told himself. "He doesn't care about you anymore. The only reason he wanted to talk with you was because finding out you were in the hospital made him feel guilty. He isn't doing this because he cares. He's just doing it so he wouldn't feel guilty anymore."

"Talking to yourself, Potter?" Harry looked up and saw Professor Snape sneering at him. "Is that why you missed so much classes? They realized you were crazy and sent you to an asylum."

Most of his teachers weren't informed about the reason why he missed school, and Harry intended to keep it that way. He looked Professor Snape right in the eye, before turning and continuing to walk away.

Snape was surprised when Harry looked him in the eye. The look in his eyes wasn't the same defiance that he always saw in there. His eyes looked… dull, almost as if there were no life in there. He could even see tear marks on his face. Snape walked on, continuing to think about Harry.

He stopped when he spotted Draco. He was still on the same place he was when Harry left him. It was as if he hadn't moved.

"Mr. Malfoy, what are you doing standing in the middle of the Hall?" Snape asked.

"Sorry, sir." Draco replied softly, walking forward.

Snape stood, puzzled at his favorite student's condition. He looked forlorn, as if he had lost all hope and didn't care what happened to him. Snape could see that he had been crying, just like Harry had been. _Had something happened between the two?_

Note: Another chapter finished. Short, I know. But that's all I could think of for now. I'll try to get more on the next chapter.

But, I got a bit of writer's block.

Any suggestions?

Anything you want to see happen next?

Review and tell me.


	26. Chapter 26

Draco lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling. It had been a week since his confrontation with Harry. He had decided to give Harry what he wanted – space. He had also needed time to think about what he was going to do be doing about everything. For the time being, he had avoided Harry, which was hard because they had classes together.

I want him back so badly. But I can't force him to be with me again. He doesn't seem to want to have anything to do with me anymore. But being away from him, not seeing his smile every single day, not hearing his voice… all of this is tearing me apart. What am I going to do? Maybe some sleep will help me think better.

Draco turned in bed and pulled the covers over his head. He closed his eyes and tried to sleep. He tossed and turned in his bed, trying to get himself into a more comfortable position, after a while, he just gave up and lay staring at the ceiling once more.

"What's wrong with you?" A drowsy voice asked from somewhere in the room. Draco sat up and followed the voice and saw that it was Blaise.

"You're still awake?" Draco asked.

"I wasn't. But all your tossing and turning and all that noise you were making woke me up." Blaise replied, sleepily rubbing his eyes and suppressing a yawn.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Draco apologized.

"What's bugging you anyway?"

Draco remained silent for a while before replying. "Harry."

"What about him?" Blaise asked, sounding more awake now. "I thought you two were over already?"

"We are. But that doesn't mean I don't still have feelings for him."

"You're still not over him?" Blaise asked, looking surprised.

"Never was," Draco replied.

"But, you were the one that broke it off." Draco nodded. "What the hell? You're not making any sense Draco," Draco still didn't say anything so Blaise continued. "Well, why are you letting this affect you so much? The Draco Malfoy I knew wouldn't just sit here and mope; he'd do everything he could to get what he wanted."

"It's different with Harry." Draco finally replied.

"How's it different?" Blaise asked.

"Harry doesn't want to be with me anymore. He told me to leave him alone. And as much as I don't want to, I have to respect what he wants."

"Since when did you care about things like that?"

"I love Harry, Blaise." Draco continued before Blaise could interrupt him. "And, if he doesn't want to be with me, I don't see how forcing him to get back with me is going to work in my favor. I can't force him to do something he doesn't want to do. First of all, it's just not right. And secondly, it's only going to make him hate me more. And I really don't want that."

"Harry told you he hated you?" Blaise asked after a while.

"No, not exactly; but he doesn't have to say it for me to get the idea. He doesn't want anything to do with me. I'm only hurting him. And I really don't want that."

"How do you know that's what he really wants?" Blaise asked.

"I just do." Draco sighed. "You should go back to sleep. I'm going to try to sleep to." With that, Draco pulled the sheets over his head and Blaise could no longer get a word out of him.

Blaise leaned back against the headboard of his bed, unable to fall back asleep. Occasionally, he would gaze over at the direction of Draco's bed as he started to sort out the thoughts running through his mind.

Harry sat in class, staring into space. He had about twenty minutes until Professor Snape comes in and starts the class. All around him, students sat in their chairs and talked amongst themselves. Besides him, Ron, Hermione, and Blaise talked; he remained silent. He also ignored their occasional glances at him.

Harry looked up at the sound of the door opening and shutting. From where he was, he could see light blond hair walking into the room and to the empty seat besides his. Harry recognized him instantly. Draco. Harry quickly averted his gaze and moved his attention to his suddenly very fascinating desk.

Draco stole at glance at Harry, whose attention was fixed on his desk. He let out a soft sigh and took a seat behind Blaise, which put him right next to Harry. He silently cursed himself for coming in late and not picking a better seat. Blaise looked back and nodded a greeting at Draco, who nodded back. He pulled out some parchment and a quill and began to doodle.

After a while, Snape walked in. With a wave of his wand, some instructions appeared on the board behind him. He walked between the rows of desks and started pairing people up. Harry paled when he saw how Snape was pairing everyone up. The way things were going, he was going to end up being paired up with Draco.

Draco looked up when Snape came to walk by where he sits. He watched as Snape paired up people and realized who he was going to be paired with. Harry. He turned to look at Harry when Snape told them they were partners. Harry looked slightly pale, but still calm and indifferent.

After everyone was paired, Snape left them to do their work while he went to sit behind his desk and grade some stuff. Draco looked at a loss of what to do. Everyone was getting up to go sit with their partners, but Harry showed no signs of budging. He didn't even show any signs of acknowledging that Draco was even there. After a while, and after a cold stare from Professor Snape, he moved to sit beside Harry.

After his grading was done, Snape looked around at his students to check on their progress. His gaze stopped on Harry and Draco. The two worked quietly, not exchanging a word. Harry reached for a bottle at the same time as Draco did. Their hands brushed up against each other; the two quickly pulled their hands apart, as if they had been burned. Harry looked around, pretending to be looking for something else, while Draco looked down, suddenly very interested in his hands. Snape raised his eyebrows at their odd behavior. Snape looked at Draco one more time before deciding to talk to him after class.

**I'm back! Hehe. It's short. I know. Sorry! Don't hate me! Well, that's all I have for now. I'll try to get some more up as soon as possible. Writer's block sucks, ya know?**


	27. Chapter 27

Draco remained in his seat and watched everyone walk out and go to their next classes. Once the last person left and shut the door, Snape looked up from his work and at Draco. Draco looked back, not saying a word. The two stared at each other for a while before Draco looked away, starting to feel uncomfortable.

"Is there something you'd like to say, Mr. Malfoy?" Snape asked, finally breaking the uncomfortable silence.

"What do you mean, Professor?" Draco asked, looking back at him.

"Lately, I've noticed you haven't been yourself. And your grades have been dropping. Would you care to explain this to me?"

"I'm not sure, Professor. I guess I've just been having trouble concentrating."

"Draco," Snape got up from his desk and went to stand besides Draco. He put his hand on Draco's shoulder and looked at him. "Talk to me not as your professor, but as your god father. What's wrong?"

"It's just some personal problems uncle Sev. I don't want to bother you with it."

"If it's affecting you that much, then it must be quite troubling indeed. I wouldn't mind knowing if you don't mind sharing."

"It's… Harry."

"Potter?" Snape asked, raising an eyebrow at his god son. Draco merely nodded. "What about Potter? Is something going on between the two of you?"

"No!" Draco said a little too defensively. He sighed then continued. "Well, not anymore, anyway."

"What do you mean by 'not anymore'?"

"It's a long story uncle Sev. I hope you have time."

"I don't have a class right now. So yes, Draco, I have the time."

"Well, for one, I'm gay." Draco looked up, expecting to see scorn in his godfather's eyes but saw nothing.

"Your displays with Mr. Wealsey told it all, Draco."

"Oh yeah," Draco blushed, forgetting about that. "Well, before I was with Ron. I was with Harry." Draco could see the shock in his Snape's eyes. "Things were going great for a while, a year to be exact, but then I ruined it, and on my anniversary nonetheless. I'm horrible." Draco fought back tears as images of a hurt Harry flashed through his mind. "Anyway, Harry's reputation was at stake. It was getting harder and harder for the two of us to hide our relationship. Rumors were starting to go around that the savior of the wizarding world was in a relationship with the son of a former death eater." Draco paused. Snape just looked at him and motioned for him to continue.

"The rumors were starting to get really bad. Magazines and tabloids started printing out things about how the dark lord had possessed Harry and we should all avoid him. We – me, Granger, and Weasley – did our best to make sure Harry never got a hold of those articles. He never did. But everyone else in the school did. They gave him hostile looks in the halls and every time they saw him. Many times I heard people planning on "taking him out" before he did anything to them. I couldn't let that happen to Harry. I couldn't let him get hurt because of me. I had to put an end to it before it got to Harry. After that was when I went to Ron. I thought if people saw me with Ron, the rumors about Harry would stop. And it did. I'm glad it did. But I've hurt Harry far more than anyone else could have. At least against everyone else, I know that he could take them. But what I did, there was no way he could have protected himself against that."

Snape waited for Draco to say more. But since it looked like Draco was not going to say anymore, he decided to speak. "Now that you mention it, I did realize how your relationship with Mr. Potter had changed over the year. You seemed less hostile and more civil towards each other. And this may have also explained the change in Mr. Potter during the past couple of months. And this does explain the hostility and tension all the students seemed to have had whenever Mr. Potter was in the room. But there are some things that I don't understand. I understand what you mean when you claimed that Mr. Potter could take them. Though I hate to admit it, a person who was able to take down the Dark Lord can surely handle a few students. But what did you mean when you said that he could not have protected himself from what you did?"

Draco seemed to have a hard time replying. "Do you remember when Harry was not in class for a few weeks?" Snape nodded. "He was in the hospital wing. He tried to kill himself."

"Mr. Potter tried to kill himself?" Snape seemed surprised. "He never struck me as the suicidal type."

"I know. It's all my fault. He would never do something like that. I drove him to do that."

"Surely, it isn't your fault." Snape tried to reassure him.

"It is." Draco replied, tears finally spilling from his eyes. "Even Blaise and the others said so. He had never been this suicidal until now. It's all my fault."

"I'm sorry to say, Draco, but, I'm not quite sure what to say about this."

"Its ok," Draco replied, managing a small smile. "It probably wouldn't have changed what I thought anyway. And it felt good just telling someone about it. Thank you, Uncle Sev."

"Any time, Draco," Snape replied. Draco stood up grabbed all of his things. He made sure he looked alright before he walked out of the door.

"So that's why you left him?" a voice said as soon as Draco shut the door. It was Blaise.

"You were listening?" Draco asked, glaring at Blaise.

"You left Harry because of THAT?" Blaise asked, moving closer to Draco.

"What's it to you?" The boys were less than a foot away from each other, glaring menacingly. A couple of students had walked by but quickly rushed away seeing the death glares the two were giving each other. They didn't want to get in between these two.

"THAT has got to be one of the STUPIDEST things you've ever done Draco. I know you don't think sometimes, but I didn't think you'd be that STUPID." Blaise said venomously, his gaze not leaving Draco's.

"Ok, fine! I'm stupid. I'm dumb. I'm an ass, a total bastard, a stupid bitch. I get it, ok?! You think Harry's the only one who's getting affected by all this? This is hurting me, too. This is killing me inside. I'm hurting just like Harry is. But the difference between us is I'm not stupid enough to take my own life!"

"So now I'm stupid?" A voice said from behind the two boys. The two turned and saw Harry there, his eyes shining with unshed tears.

"Harry," Draco said in a suddenly soft voice, "That's not what I meant,"

"Don't even bother explaining, I don't want to hear it." There was so much hurt in Harry's voice and it nearly broke Draco's heart to hear it. He watched helplessly as Harry ran off and Blaise followed him. When the two were gone, Draco let out a pained scream and punched the wall with all his strength, immediately tearing his knuckles.


	28. Chapter 28

_Stupid?! So I'm stupid, huh? _Harry thought furiously. He sat by the lake, throwing rocks into the water. Harry unpinned the safety pin that was attached to his robe. He stared at the tip for a while before pulling up his shirt sleeve. He pressed down hard on his arm before pulling the pin down his arm. He let out a soft hiss of pain as his arm stung and a thin red line started to form on his arm. He was about to make another cut when a hand grabbed his.

"Harry, don't do this." Blaise tried to pull the pin out of Harry's arms. "He's not worth it."

"He called me stupid," Harry said, tears streaming down his face. Blaise took that moment to pull the pin out of his hands. Draco's words kept playing in his head. Sobs raked through Harry's body. Blaise pulled Harry into a tight hug. At first, Harry tried to pull away but Blaise only held him tighter. Harry wrapped his arms around Blaise and cried his heart out.

"It's going to be okay, Harry," Blaise reassured him, rubbing relaxing circles on his back. "It's going to be ok."

The two remained like that for a while. Harry crying into Blaise's shoulder while Blaise just hugged him and told him it was going to be ok. They didn't notice the person looking at them a few feet away.

After Blaise had left after Harry, Draco had followed, hoping to talk things out of Harry. He saw Harry trying to cut himself with a safety pin and felt his heart wrench at the sight. He felt better after seeing Blaise take it away from him, before a jealous rage took over him. With clenched fists, he watched as Blaise hugged and comforted Harry. _His_ Harry.

Draco lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He was the only on in the room. Everyone was in the Great Hall, eating dinner. He had no appetite and decided to skip it instead. He closed his eyes and tried to clear his head. At the sound of the door opening and closing, he opened his eyes.

"Not eating?" Blaise asked, walking towards his bed.

"What are you doing here?" Draco sat up and glared at Blaise.

"I left something in here, I came to get it. You don't have to be so hostile."

"Shouldn't you be in the Great Hall, feeding your _boyfriend_," Draco spat out the word boyfriend like it was poisonous, though saying it killed him inside.

"What boyfriend?" Blaise looked at Draco like he was crazy.

"Harry," Draco fought hard to keep the tears out of his eyes.

"What?" Blaise was starting to wonder if Draco really WAS crazy. "Harry's not my boyfriend."

"Don't lie to me!"

"I'm not lying to you!" Blaise shouted at Draco.

"I saw you," Draco said in a soft voice.

"Saw me what?"

"With Harry!" Draco shouted, "I saw the two of you by the lake after he ran off. I saw you holding him and comforting him, things **I** should be doing. NOT YOU!"

"Draco, listen to me," Blaise said, trying to calm Draco down, "Harry isn't my boyfriend. He's just a friend of mine. My _friend_ was hurt so I did what _friends_ do," Blaise made sure to emphasize every 'friend.' "I comforted him and helped him out in his time of need."

"You sure?" Draco asked quietly, not looking at Blaise.

"I'm sure," Blaise gave him a small reassuring smile, but Draco wasn't looking at him so he did not see it. "I like Harry and all, but he and I are just friends. I don't see him like that. And he could never _ever_ see me like that, so why bother?"

"Blaise, what have I done?" Draco asked, sounding so dejected.

"You screwed up, Draco," Blaise shook his head slightly, "you screwed up big time."

**It's probably my shortest chapter yet. SORRY! DON'T HATE ME! Hehe. I'll get more LONGER ones up a little later. PROMISE. **

**So…**

**Review.**

**Tell me what you think.**

**Suggestions are always welcome and greatly appreciated.**


	29. Chapter 29

Harry sat in the Gryffindor common room, staring into the first. It was 3AM and everyone was already asleep.

"Harry? What are you still doing up?" A voice said from the stairs. Harry looked to see Hermione walking up to him.

"I could ask you the same question," Harry replied, watching Hermione take a seat on the couch opposite where he was sitting.

"I needed to use the bathroom," Hermione replied, "Then I couldn't get back to sleep so I thought I'd just come down here and get some work done."

"You do too much work, you know that?" Harry said with a small smile.

"I know," Hermione replied, giggling softly. "How are you feeling?"

"I don't really know."

"Why? What's wrong?"

"I just…" Harry stopped to try to get his thoughts straight. "I just don't know what's going on with me anymore."

"Why don't you tell me? Maybe I can help?" Hermione moved to sit with Harry.

"It's this thing with Draco," Harry finally replied. "I'm in love with him, Hermione. I love him so much that it hurts."

"Then, why don't you go back to him, Harry? He seems really sorry, and he really loves you, too."

"That's not the point, Hermione," Harry said softly. "He hurt me once before, what makes me know that he won't hurt me again?"

"He looks sincere about loving you," Hermione offered.

"He looked sincere before. He looked me in the eye and told me he loved me, said he meant it with all his heart and that nothing will change that. **Ever.** Then he broke my heart. He tore it up and ripped it into a million pieces. And to add salt to the wound, he went out with my best friend." Hermione wasn't exactly sure what she could say that could make Draco look good at that moment so she remained silent. "Now he's going back to telling me he loves me again? He said that once before, it turned out to be a lie. How do I know this isn't a lie too? I don't want to risk getting hurt again."

"Some things are worth that risk, Harry,"

"How do I know this is worth it?" Harry looked at Hermione helplessly, tears shining in his emerald eyes. Hermione's heart wrenched at the sight. His eyes that once shown with life were now dull; it was the eyes of someone who had given up on life.

"You'll never know until you try," Hermione silently cursed herself for not thinking of anything better to say to her hurt friend.

"I don't know if I want to try…"

"Follow your instinct?" Hermione said out loud while thinking 'wow, I really suck at this stuff.'

"My heart says I should trust him, but my head says not to," Harry started. "It's like a never ending battle inside of me. I don't know what to do anymore. I don't ever want to hurt like that again, but being away from Draco is killing me inside."

"Harry," Hermione placed a hand on his shoulder, "I'm sorry. I don't really know what to say. I'm not good when it comes to these things." She managed a sheepish smile and Harry couldn't help but smile back. "No one deserves to get hurt like you did, and Draco was out of line. You didn't deserve that; no one deserves that. This is a tough dilemma you're going through and I wish I were more help. You should do whatever makes you happy, Harry. I know that you could be risking a lot, but some things are worth that risk."

"Don't be sorry," Harry smiled at her and hugged her. "Sometimes all I need is someone to talk to about these things. And I don't care if you can't really help me in this because actually, no one but me can help me with this. But I'm glad that you care enough to try and help."

"Don't worry about it," Hermione smiled and hugged him back. "I'm sure you'll get through this, Harry. I have faith in you. And if you ever need anyone, Blaise and I are always here for you. I think I'll go back and get some sleep. Good night, Harry."

"Thanks Hermione," Harry watched his friend get up from the couch and move towards the stairs. "You're the best. Good night."

"Don't mention it," Hermione looked back at him and gave him one last smile before disappearing up the stairs.

"Wow, that sucks," Hermione had just finished telling Blaise about her conversation with Harry the night before.

"I know," Hermione replied. "I just wish that I could help them somehow."

"Same here," Blaise agreed, looking thoughtful. "You know, all those two need is a little push."

"What do you mean?" Ron asked. He had been with them, too, but had remained silent the whole time.

"Well, Harry clearly still loves Draco and still wants him back. And there's no doubt in the world that Draco wants Harry to forgive him and take him back."

"Yeah, but how can we help?" Hermione asked. "Harry's too afraid of getting hurt again, and Draco doesn't want to approach him because he doesn't want Harry to hate him anymore that he supposedly already does."

"Someone has to help Harry deal with the hurt," said Blaise.

"Maybe you should do it, Ron?" suggested Hermione.

"Why me?" asked Ron.

"You _are _his best friend," pointed out Blaise.

"I'll try…" said Ron.

"Hey Harry," Ron greeted, taking a seat next to him. Harry looked up from the lake and turned to smile at Ron. The lake had become his favorite place.

"Hey Ron, what's up?" Harry asked when Ron sat down.

"Nothing really," Ron shrugged. "I just wanted to talk, you know, like old times?"

"Sure, what do you want to talk about?"

"How have you been?" Ron asked, trying to think of a way to get him started on talking about the situation with Draco without actually mentioning it.

"Hermione told you about last night?" Harry asked, seeing right through his best friend.

"Yeah," Ron said sheepishly, not even bothering to lie to Harry.

"You want to talk about it?" Harry asked.

"It's up to you. I'm just here to listen and help where I can." Ron shrugged.

"There's really nothing much to say about this. I just don't know what to do anymore."

"Why don't you try approaching him, Harry?" Ron suggested, "You never used to be afraid of him, why start now?"

"He doesn't want to see me, Ron. He's been avoiding me for weeks now. He's probably gotten over this already and found someone else." Ron could detect the pain in his friend's voice.

"Of course he does, Harry. All you have to do is approach him."

"How do you know?"

"He's been talking to Blaise. He really wants to be with you Harry. He's not over you. He'll never get over you."

"Then why has he been avoiding me, Ron?"

"Well, you haven't exactly wanted him to approach you. Didn't you tell him that you hated him and wanted him to leave you alone?"

"I didn't mean it," Harry said so softly that Ron barely heard him.

"Then why'd you say it?" Ron asked.

"Its just one of those things that slips out; you know, when you're so mad at someone or really hurt and you just can't think and things like 'I hate you' and 'leave me alone' come out?"

"I think I know what you're talking about," said Ron.

"Yeah, well, it was one of those times. It just slipped out. I regret ever saying it."

"Then go tell that to, Draco,"

"I just…can't," Harry said, avoiding Ron's gaze.

"Why not?" Ron asked, trying to understand his friend.

"I just can't. It's confusing. But I can barely think about Draco without my heart wrenching."

"But, if you talk to him, everything will get better, won't it?" Ron asked.

"I don't know, Ron. I really don't. Something is really wrong with me. I don't even know why I do the things I do anymore. I'm so fucked up."

"No you're not. Don't say that." Ron placed a comforting hand on Harry's shoulder.

"Yeah, I am. If I weren't so messed up, I'd have figured out this Draco situation before it got this bad."


	30. Chapter 30

**Before I start, I'd like to say thank you to all my reviewers and readers. You people are the bestest. Hehe. And a special thanks to njferrell who just gave me a great idea for what I'm going to be writing in the next few chapters. **

"Harry's not budging on this thing," Ron told Hermione after dinner. Harry had decided to get to bed early to get some sleep.

"Blaise is going to try to talk to Draco again," Hermione replied.

"You know," Ron started, "I don't think just talking to them is going to work."

"What do you mean?"

"We've all talked to Harry and Draco about this already, neither of them is doing anything about it. They're both too stubborn to admit that they're wrong. And they don't want to risk losing anything or getting hurt again. Their damn stubbornness is making this even harder."

"I get what you mean, but there still should be something we could do about all of this."

"I think the only way for this to work, is if the two of them talk to each other. We've already tried talking to them a million times; all that's left to try is to get the two of them to talk to each other."

"But how are we going to do that, Ron? They can't even look at each other let alone talk."

"How about if they're forced to talk to each other?"

"What do you have in mind?"

Ron looked around to make sure that no one was listening to them. The only other people there were across the room so he figured it was okay to speak. "How about, if we lock them up together? Just the two of them? After a while they'd have to speak, won't they?"

"Ron, that's brilliant!" Hermione exclaimed. "How are we going to pull it off though? The two of them barely go anywhere but to class and to get meals. Blaise says Draco is always locked in his room sulking, and Harry's either in his room or at the lake."

"I don't know. That part, we still have to figure out," said Ron.

"Let's tell Blaise about this tomorrow, maybe he can come up with something," Suggested Hermione. Ron nodded.

"That's a good idea," Blaise commented after Hermione and Ron told him about their plan to get Harry and Draco talking again. "But how are we going to do it though?"

"We were hoping you'd help us figure that part out," Ron replied sheepishly. Everyone stopped to think.

"Room of Requirement?" Hermione suggested after a while.

"Will they be able to break out of there?" Ron asked.

"I don't think so?" Hermione said a little doubtfully.

"They might, though," Blaise spoke up after a while. "Doesn't the room provide someone with whatever they need? So if Draco and Harry need a way out of there, wouldn't the room be able to give it to them?"

"But, what if we required a room that wouldn't let the two out until they managed to talk things out?" Hermione asked. "Wouldn't that work?"

"But, what about what Blaise said about Harry and Draco wanting a way out of the room?" Ron asked.

"I really don't know," Hermione asked. "Isn't there someone we would ask?"

"But wouldn't the teachers be suspicious that we want to lock the two of them up together in a room?"

"Oh yeah, how are we going to do this?" Blaise asked. The three went into deep thought, trying to figure out how they are going to help their two friends.

**Really really short. Don't kill me! Hehe. I'll get more up in a little while. I have so much work to get done by the end of this week so I'm going to be busy.**


	31. Chapter 31

Professor Snape walked around the room, stopping to examine a few of the students' cauldrons. He stopped and frowned when he reached Draco's working station. The boy's performance had not been what it used to.

"Mr. Malfoy, I'd like a word with you after class," Snape said softly so that only Draco and his partner could hear.

"Yes, Professor," Draco replied quietly. His partner, Blaise, glanced at him from the corner of his eye and continued to try and fix up their potion.

Once everyone left, Draco looked up to face Snape. "What did you want to talk about, Professor?"

"You don't have to be so formal when its just the two of us, you know that, Draco."

"Sorry, Uncle Sev."

"Don't apologize." Snape paused, trying to pick his words carefully. "Draco, your grades have not been improving. I know you have these problems with Mr. Potter, but how bad can it be that it is affecting you this much?"

"I'm sorry, Uncle Sev. I just haven't been able to concentrate. There's just too much on my mind."

"Is there no way that you could get this out of your mind? For your class work's sake?" Snape asked.

"I'm trying. Really, I am. It's just so hard with a lot going through my mind. I just can't get over this until I fix this. I'm not stopping until I make him mine once more."

The determination was clear in Draco's voice. "You don't seem to be making much of an effort to get him back, from what I've been seeing."

"I know," Draco sighed. "I just can't bring myself to approach him. I don't want him to push me away again. It just hurts too much."

Snape sighed, unable to find a way to get through to the boy. "Well, for your sake, Draco, I hope you figure this out. You may leave."

Without a word, Draco stood up and left the room, shutting the door softly behind him. Snape returned to his desk to examine the flasks of potion that as on the table. He looked up to the sound of the door opening and closing once more.

"Sorry, Professor," Blaise said, walking into the room. "I left something in here."

Snape nodded and went back to his work. Once Blaise got whatever he was looking for, he headed for the door. He stopped right before he was about to open it. "Professor, may I ask you something?"

"Sure," Snape replied, looking up to give Blaise his attention.

"I've noticed that you've been talking to Draco about his poor performance lately."

"Yes, I have." Snape replied, wondering where this was leading to.

"We – as me, Ron, Hermione, and I – we've noticed this behavior too, from both Harry and Draco. And we're getting really concerned and frankly, also quite tired of all their nonsense." Snape nodded for him to continue. "The three of us have come up with something that could maybe put an end to all of this."

"And what, may I ask, is that?" Snape tried to hide his interest.

"We were thinking about locking them up in a room together until they decided to finally talk to each other and work this out."

"That sounds like a good idea," Snape said after a while.

"We have on problem though," started Blaise.

"Well?" Snape motioned for him to go on."

"First off, Draco and Harry haven't been going anywhere but their rooms, classes, and the dining hall. And occasionally Harry would go to the lake. We're not sure how to get them in a room together. And we were thinking of placing them in the room of requirement, but we weren't sure if it would backfire on us."

"The room of requirement sounds like a great idea, how would it backfire?"

"Well, the purpose of the room is to give a person what they need. Well, if we needed a room that would keep the two of them in there until they talk this out, and then I'm sure that's what we'll get." Blaise paused to catch his breath while Snape nodded, taking in all the information. "But what if Draco and Harry wanted a way out of that place? Wouldn't it give it to them as well?"

"Hmm…" Snape stopped to think. Blaise presented a good idea. "Even I'm not quite certain how the room works other than giving a person what they require."

"Maybe," Blaise hesitated, not sure how the man would react to what he had to say. "We were thinking about this, and we've decided that we need some help from a professor or something. Maybe you could help us?"

**My chapters are getting shorter. Sorry! XD. But its final exams this week and I got a lot of work to catch up on before grades are due. I'll get longer ones maybe over spring break?**

**Anyway,**

**Tell me what you think.**

**Reviews are greatly appreciated**

**Ideas are always welcome**

**--- meee**


	32. Chapter 32

"So how are we going to do this

"So how are we going to do this?" Hermione asked Ron and Blaise after lunch. They were all headed to the library. Harry wanted to be alone and went to the lake; or they all thought he was going to the lake.

"Professor Snape agreed to help us," said Blaise.

"He'd let us lock his favorite student in a room with the student he hates more than anything?" Ron asked disbelief clear on his face.

"Apparently," answered Blaise, "He's tired of Draco's depressed behavior as well. I doubt he cares much for Harry but Draco _is_ his godson, he'd want to make sure he was okay. And if he needs Harry for this, I guess he'll swallow that hate and deal with it."

"Still doesn't sound like him to me," Ron said with a huff.

"Well, Mr. Weasley, you don't know me quite as well as you thought then," a voice said from behind Ron. Ron instantly paled when he recognized the voice. Blaise coughed to disguise his laughter while Hermione giggled behind her hand.

"I'd like to have a word with the three of you," said Snape, ignoring each of their reactions. The three silently followed him to his office, not saying a word but exchanging curious looks.

Once they were in his office and the door was shut, Snape turned to talk to them. "Normally, I would not participate in locking two students up together and forcing them to talk, but if this will help Draco, then I'd be willing to help out, even if it is Potter." Snape tried his best to keep the malice out of his voice when he said 'Potter'. "What exactly is your plan?"

"We're not completely sure at the moment, Professor" answered Hermione. "So far, all we know is that we have to get the two of them to talk. We're pretty sure that if the two of them were locked in a room together, eventually, they'll _have_ to talk."

"They might even have to work together to try and get out," Blaise put in.

"When do you plan to start this?" Professor Snape asked.

"We were thinking of doing it on Friday," Hermione answered. "So that if they're going to be stubborn, they have Saturday and all weekend to try and fix this, and there aren't any classes on Monday so they can have an extra day."

"Our problem is just _how_ to get them in a room together." Ron added in.

"I believe I can take care of that part," Snape said after a minute of thought. He had already found a way to get the two stubborn boys together.

Harry lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He couldn't get to sleep. He closed his eyes and tried to stop all his thoughts, hoping that would cause him to lose consciousness. But vivid memories flashed through his head, making it hard for him to fall asleep.

_Harry sat by the lake. He had just won a quidditch game against slytherin and wanted to get some alone time before going back to the common room for the party; he stared at the lake, getting lost in his thoughts. His train of thought was broken by the sound of someone behind him. He turned around and saw familiar blonde hair._

_Draco stormed out of the slytherin common room after getting into an argument with Marcus Flint, the quidditch captain. Flint had been chastising him for missing the snitch yet again. He wanted to get away from everybody so he went to the lake. He slowed his pace down when he realized someone was already there. He moved closer to get a better look. The person turned around and Draco saw who it was._

"_What are you doing here?" Harry asked once Draco was only a few feet away._

"_This isn't your lake Potter; I can come here if I want to." Draco replied._

"_Well, I don't want you here," replied Harry, standing up so he could look at Draco directly. The blonde was only a few inches taller than him._

"_You can't have everything you want," Draco moved dangerously close to Harry. Harry moved forward, not wanting to seem intimidated. Draco was still angry because of Flint and was going to take it out on Harry. "Get…out…of…here…Potter." He spat out the name Potter like it was poisonous._

"_I don't want to," Harry replied snidely. Draco lifted a hand, about to hit Harry. Harry moved to get out of the way and ended up tripping on a tree root. He fell forward, knocking down Draco as well. They landed with a loud 'thump'. Harry on the ground with Draco on top; the fall had knocked the wind out of them and were unable to move for a moment._

_Draco looked down to glare at Harry but stopped when he saw how close they were. They faces were only a couple centimeters apart. _If I just moved my head a little forward,_ Draco thought, being fascinated by Harry's lips._

The look so soft,_ Harry thought about Draco's lips at the same time Draco was thinking about his. Harry leaned his head up a little, making the distance between them even smaller. He could feel Draco's hot breath on his skin. _He smells nice,_ he thought. Then, his eyes shot wide opened when he realized who he was talking about. Harry pushed Draco off of him and scrambled away. His heart was racing and he felt out of breath. He was too busy trying to regain his composure that he didn't notice that Draco was in the same state as he was. _

"_What the fuck were you trying to do, Potter?!" Draco screamed; he was the first one to gain his composure. He managed to plant a glare on his face and look angry though his heart was racing._

"_I…I…" Harry was lost for words. His head was filled with random thoughts and he couldn't make them out clearly. He looked at Draco and attempted to glare at Draco but stopped. For some reason, Draco looked a little different now. _He looks cute when he's angry,_ Harry thought. _What the hell am I thinking? This is DRACO MALFOY I'm talking about,_ he screamed in his head._

"_Well, Potter, out with it!" Draco demanded, getting confused by Harry's strange behavior. Harry looked like he was about to say something but instead, he turned and ran away, leaving a confused Draco behind._

Harry wiped away the tears that came with that memory. Harry had always known that he was closer to guys than he was to girls; he had assumptions that he was not completely heterosexual, but was never sure until that day. Harry let out a small humorless laugh. It was Draco Malfoy that had made Harry realize that he was gay.

Coincidently, Draco was lying in bed thinking of the same thing Harry was. Harry had left him confused that day. Draco had always known that he had a preference for guys. But he never had given Harry much of a second glance. The only time they had seen each other was during class, during meals, or on the quidditch pitch. Draco had never stopped to give Harry more than a short glance because he had always believed that he had hated the boy. But on that day, being alone with him by the lake—even if it was only for a very brief moment—Draco had seen Harry differently.

It was then that he had noticed Harry's brilliant emerald eyes. Though now they look dull and dead, he thought with a sad look on his face. He also noticed how his dark black hair in contrast to his pale skin made him have this glow. Draco could never find the words to describe it; all he knew was that he was fascinated by what he saw.

The days after that had been hard on the both of them. They had caught themselves stealing peaks of each other, unable to stop it. Luckily, no one really noticed that. There were times when Draco and Harry glanced at each other at the same time and their eyes would meet. He watched as Harry's face flushed a light pink, making him cute. Draco almost smiled at the sight but quickly forced himself to turn away.

Harry pulled the cover over his head and bit his lip, so he wouldn't make a sound that could wake up his roommates. Hot cascade of tears streamed down his face.

_Harry sighed, running his hands through his hair and throwing pebbles into the lake. Harry had just gotten into a big fight with Ron in front of everyone in the school. Ginny had decided to ask Harry out, claiming to be in love with him, and believing that he had felt the same way. Harry had done his best to deny her in the nicest way possible, but it had put her in tears. Ron had seen his crying sister and his big brother instincts had kicked in and he picked a fight with Harry. Harry, not wanting to cause a big scene, left the great Hall._

_Draco had seen what had happened in the Great Hall. He had passed by and had heard Harry reject Ginny, and had seen what had happened with Ron. Everyone at the Slytherin table was too occupied talking about what had happened with Harry and Ron that no one noticed Draco leaving. Once he was out the hall, he looked around; trying to figure out where Harry had went. After a while, he realized that Harry would have probably gone to the lake._

_Once he got to the lake, he saw Harry sitting at the edge, throwing pebbles into it. "You know," he said softly, "You're going to end up upsetting that squid in there."_

"_What are you doing here?" Harry asked, already knowing who was behind him._

"_You don't own the lake, Potter," Draco said casually._

"_If you're here to taunt me about what happened earlier, I don't want to hear it."_

"_Like I'd care what you wanted?" he said in a slightly mocking manner. "But, I am curious. What _did_ happen in there, Potter?"_

"_You saw what happened in there Malfoy," Harry replied, not wanting to get into another argument._

"_Yeah, well, why did you reject the Weasley girl? Everyone at school was just waiting for the two of you to get together," he said sarcastically._

"_I don't like her that way," Harry replied._

"_You sure looked like you did," Draco remarked._

"_Well, looks can be deceiving," Harry shrugged. "Anyway, what are you doing here? You hate me, remember?"_

"_Weren't you just the one who said looks can be deceiving? Maybe I don't really hate you after all."_

_Harry sighed. "Look, I'm not really in the mood for your head games right now. What do you want?"_

"_Why'd you say no to that Weasley chick, Harry?" Draco asked calmly._

"_Didn't I answer this already? And…did you just call me Harry?" Harry asked, annoyance clear in his voice._

"_Yeah, but I didn't like your answer," Draco simply replied. "And yes I called you Harry, that's your name, isn't it?_

"_You can't have everything you want," Harry replied, letting the name thing slide for now._

"_Well, too bad Potter because _I _get everything I want."_

"_Spoiled brat, aren't you?" Harry gave Draco a pointed look. He sighed. "Let's get to the point, shall we?"_

"_You sure you want to hear it, Potter?"_

"_Just spit it out, already!" Harry let out an exasperated sigh._

"_I want _you,_ Harry."_

"_W-W-what?" Harry stammered out. _

"_Just think about it," Draco gave him a small smirk and walked off, leaving a confused Harry behind to stare at his back, just like he had stared at Harry running away a few weeks ago._

Harry clenched his fists tightly, his knuckles turning white and his fingernails digging into his palm. These memories were driving him crazy, but for some reason, he couldn't push them away. That day had left him more confused than ever. After their first encounter at the lake, Harry had realized that there were feelings about Draco he did not know he had. But that day was the day he had realized how badly he had fallen for Draco.

Draco walked into class, trying not to fall over because he was so tired. He fell into his seat and lay his head on top of his arms, closing his eyes for a while before class began. Snape noticed his strange behavior; he also noticed that Harry was in the same state. He concluded that the two must have been up late at night, or maybe have not even gotten any sleep at all. He sighed and waited patiently for the class to start.

The class went by in a blur for Harry and Draco. Before they knew it, the class was over. The two had picked up their stuff and were heading for the door before Professor Snape's voice stopped them.

"Mr. Potter, Mr. Malfoy, you two stay behind." Harry waved goodbye to Blaise, Ron, and Hermione, not noticing the smiles they had on their faces.

**Another chapter done… WOOT! LOL Anyway, sorry it was so long for the weight. Spring break wasn't much of a break—lots of homework and such. And my internets been acting up…and power outages have been happening here because the stupid people who provide us with electricity are gay… ANYWAY, you don't want to hear my excuses. Hope you enjoy. Cheesy corny flashbacks, I know… Romance isn't really my thing, ya know? Hehe.**

**Review and tell me watcha like. Watcha hate. You know the drill. THANK YOOOOOOOOUUUU.**


	33. Chapter 33

Harry sat in on at desk, at one corner of the room

Harry sat in on at desk, at one corner of the room. It was the farthest he could get away from Draco, who sat at the last edge on the other side of the room.

"_What did you need us for, Professor?" Draco asked once everyone was out of the room._

"_You're performance in class has been quite bad lately," Snape started. "I noticed that the two of you have been acting similarly as well. I have come to a conclusion that this problem is a personal problem between the two of you." Snape ignored the confused look Harry through at him and the look of disbelief on Draco's face. "The two of you will remain here until this is all settled, is that clear?"_

"_But professor—"The two started at the same time._

"_No buts, the two of you," Snape demanded. With a flick of his wand, the two boys' wands were in his hands. "I have put a spell onto this room that will not let you out until the two of you have resolved this issue. You're meals will be brought to you here. So I if you want to get out of here soon, I suggest you work this out. Now."_

Draco sat in his corner, occasionally looking over to sneak glances at Harry. Harry looked uncomfortable, fidgeting in his seat. He looked trapped. Draco felt trapped, as well. Plates appeared in front of the two. Their dinners had arrived.

Harry poked at his food with the fork. He wasn't in much of a mood to eat. He glanced out of the corner of his eye to see that Draco silently picking at his food as well. He sighed and forced himself to take a few bites of chicken.

"Nothing's happening," Ron commented. Ron, Blaise, Hermione, and Professor Snape were in Snape's office, watching Harry and Draco in a mirror that had been charmed.

"Those two are impossible," Hermione sighed. "They keep looking at each other and it's like they _want_ to say something, but they just can't."

"I know," Blaise agreed, watching the two boys pick at their food and exchange stolen glances at each other. "This is going to take forever."

"They know that the only way out of there is to get along," Professor Snape commented. "If you look at the two of them, they look anxious. They looked trapped. They won't be able to take much of it anymore and will have to talk to each other. It's only a matter of time." Snape seemed calm and confident that they'll talk. The others were a bit more skeptic. The continued to watch the two, hoping that one of them would speak to the other already.

Harry turned to Draco. The boy was faced away from him. He opened his mouth, about to say something, but stopped, unsure of what to say. He tried again, but nothing came out. Harry sighed and decided to give up.

Draco turned to Harry, trying to come up with something he could possibly say. He wasn't that good with small talk.

"How long do you think they'll keep us in here?" Harry's soft voice broke the room. He said it so quietly that Draco wasn't sure he had heard it at all.

"Professor Snape is in on it," Draco started "so it might take a while. And we don't have school next Monday, which leaves and extra day in here. But I doubt they'll let us stay in here so long that we'll miss our classes."

"Oh, okay," Harry replied in that same quiet voice. He tried to think of something else to say but couldn't.

"So much for a conversation," Ron muttered. They were still watching Harry and Draco's progress. So far, nothing worth watching was really happening. "This is going to take forever."

"You can say that again," Blaise agreed, taking a sip out of drink. "They've been there for like, two hours now, and still nothing. I didn't think anyone could stand being stuck in silence for that long."

"That silence _was _broken." Hermione pointed out matter-of-factly. "Even if it was for a _really_ short time, it was _still_ broken. That's got to be some kind of progress. No matter how small it is."

"But still, if they continue going on at that rate," Blaise continued to watch Harry and Draco, "nothing's ever going to fix those two."

"Don't be so negative!" Hermione gave him a small slap on the shoulder.

"I'm not!" Blaise argued. "I'm just being realistic. So far, it looks like this is going nowhere. How do we know this plan will work? For all we know, those two could be stubborn enough to stick it out for the whole three days."

"But if you were trapped in a room for three days with someone you can't really talk to, and you know the only way out is to work it out with that person, wouldn't you swallow your pride and just do it?" suggested Ron. "And, we didn't tell them that they were in there for just the three days. They could be thinking that they're stuck in there until they make up, so they'll talk sooner or later. And Hermione's right. A small progression is better than nothing."

"I guess," Blaise finally agreed.

Harry got off his chair and walked around the room, stretching his legs. Instead of going back to the seat, he took a seat on the ground by the wall. He leaned his back on the cool wall of the class and closed his eyes, trying to calm his fast beating heart. Every second that passed by was making him more uncomfortable. He hated the idea of having to be locked in a room with Draco, but at the same time, he liked it.

Draco watched out of the corner of his eye as Harry closed his eyes. A pained expression seemed to cross his face. Draco clenched his fists, his hands itching to touch Harry's soft pale skin and get rid of that expression. He lifted his hand slightly then dropped it back down on his lap. He stretched his back out and went to sit in the corner opposite of Harry.

"What are you doing?" Harry asked, hearing the commotion Draco made when he moved.

"Taking a page out of your book," Draco said with a shrug. "Sitting in that chair for too long is hurting my back. The ground seems oddly more… comfortable."

"Whatever." Harry muttered and turned away from Draco.

_Harry sat by the lake, leaning his back against a tree._

"_Why do you like sitting on the ground so much?" Draco asked, leaning on the tree as well, but he was standing instead of sitting._

"_It's comfortable," Harry simply replied, not looking up at Draco._

"_Can't you just summon a chair or something? Wouldn't that be more comfortable?" Draco asked._

"_No, sitting in a chair for too long ends up hurting my back."_

"_It seems so…dirty," Draco replied._

_Harry let out a soft laugh. "Why don't you try it? It beats standing up and having your legs hurt."_

_Draco was reluctant. Harry reached a hand up and grabbed Draco's and pulled him down. Draco clumsily fell on his butt. He ignored Harry's soft giggle and tried to make himself comfortable. After a while, Harry spoke up. "Well?"_

"_You're right." Draco admitted it after a while. "Sitting on the ground is oddly more…comfortable." Harry beamed up at him and Draco couldn't help but smile as well. The two looked at each other for a while, their eyes locked together. It seemed like all time stopped and everything else with it. All they could hear was their breathing, and the faint rhythm of their beating hearts. Draco leaned down slowly, not completely conscious of what he was doing. At the same time, Harry leaned up. In a matter of seconds – though to the two boys it felt like hours – their lips touched._

_Harry was shocked at first, unsure of what to do. All he could feel was the tingling sensation that was on his lips. Then, he felt Draco's lips slowly move against his and he moved his as well. The two were locked in a kiss, and nothing else mattered but the feeling of their lips against each other._

Harry hugged his knees tightly, laying his head on his arms. He bit his lip, trying to stay quiet. He didn't want Draco to know that he was crying. _He said those words,_ Harry thought, _he said those exact same words right before our first kiss._

Draco turned when he heard a small gasp; it was so soft he didn't think he heard it. But when he looked, he could see Harry wiping tears from his eyes. He opened his mouth to say something, but wasn't sure of what to say. Right now, he had a feeling that whatever he would say would just make things worse. _I hate seeing you cry,_ Draco thought in his head. It was the only place he could say what he wanted without having to worry about making Harry feel horrible. He had a feeling that he was the reason for the tears that were falling from his eyes. Nothing hurt him more than knowing that he had hurt the one he loved the most.

**Wow it's another chapter. LOL. Anyway, this is probably a pointless chapter. Thanks for reading it anyway… I got writer's block and it won't leave. Sob cry sob. LOL. **

**I need ideas. Help?**

**Review and tell me what you think. And don't forget to leave ideas! Hehe.**

**Or… email me? My email should be on that profile thingymajiger.**

**THANK YOOOOOUUUUUU.**


	34. Chapter 34

Vixengreen

Before I start, I'd like to thank Vixengreen and Kyla Mizuki for giving me and idea for the next few chapters. Also, thanks to everyone else for your reviews! You guys are awesome! Anyway, the chapters may not be like you suggested, but it gave me ideas, so yeah. Props to you!

"I'm going to kill those guys for this," Harry muttered under his breath. He leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes. He wasn't sure how long he had been in that room, but he was sure it was really dark out now. The cold was seeping in through the doors, making the dungeon even colder than ever. He pulled his clothes tighter around him in an attempt to stay warm.

Draco watched Harry from half-lidded eyes. He could tell the dark-haired boy was getting tired of being in the room. He thought back and tried to figure out how long they had been in here. He guessed that they gave them food at around six o'clock. It's been about four hours since then—or somewhere close to that. So, it should be around ten o'clock now. How long is this stupid thing going to last? Draco thought to himself. But even though he wouldn't admit it, there was still a part of him that felt glad he was alone with Harry.

Harry, his eyes remaining closed, thought over all of his options. He had to get out of here, and soon. Being trapped with Draco was making his nerves go out of control. If he talked to Draco, then it would be all over and he'd be free. If he didn't, he was stuck in there for maybe three days? At the least? But he wasn't sure what was harder. Facing Draco once and for all, facing all that pain and hurt he's suffered for so long, or staying in a locked room for about three days. Right now, it seemed like enduring the next three days was the better option. At least they provided him with food. He let out a small smile at this. He wasn't so sure he could face Draco.

"Hey," Harry said softly, after some thinking. Draco's head shot up in surprise at the sound of his quiet voice. It had been so quiet he almost didn't hear it. Thankfully, there was nothing but them making a sound in the quiet room.

"Yes?" Draco asked after regaining his composure. This seemed like the first time that Harry seemed open to a conversation in a really long time. He didn't want to say anything that could ruin that moment.

"Look," Harry nervously ran a hand through his hair. He wasn't exactly sure what he was doing. "I've been thinking…" Harry paused, trying to think of the right words to say before he said them out loud. He clenched his fists of his lap. He was so nervous that they were shaking. He bit the inside of his cheek to try to calm himself down. "The only reason we're in here," he started, "was because Ron, Blaise, and Hermione wanted the two of us to have a face to face conversation about whatever it is we have to talk about."

Draco nodded his understanding, beckoning for Harry to continue. "From the looks of it, there is no way that they are going to let us out of here until we talk. So, how about we talk about this now and get it over with? I'm pretty sure you don't want to stay in this stupid room for the rest of the weekend."

"Yeah, you're right." Draco agreed. He thought quickly for something else to say but nothing came to mind. "So, what do you want to talk about, exactly?"

"I'm…not sure myself," Harry replied after a while. "But knowing those three, they'll be keeping an eye on us. I guess the first thing we have to do is figure out what they want to hear the two of us to talk about."

"I guess they want to us to talk about what happened." Draco put in.

"What happened with what?" Harry knew what Draco was hinting at, but refused to talk about it.

"Harry, I know you're mad at me. I know I hurt you, betrayed you. And I truly am sorry. What do I have to do to make you believe me? I'm sorry. Please. Just accept my apology and let's fix this."

"First off," Harry replied softly, "Please don't say 'sorry' anymore. I don't like that word so much." Draco looked at Harry curiously, but Harry didn't notice the look. "Anyone can say sorry without truly meaning it Draco. How do I know you're not going to lie to me?"

"Harry, please, you have to trust me. I can't take this. This is killing me." Draco begged, fighting back the tears that were already shining in his eyes.

Harry bit back his lip, fighting back tears as well. He still wasn't emotionally strong enough to talk about this topic. "I don't think I can trust you just yet Draco; Not this easily, anyway." Harry's voice was strained. He was really trying hard not to cry in front of Draco.

A feeling of helplessness washed over Draco. He didn't know what he could do to get Harry to believe him. "I understand that you can't trust me," Draco said after a while. "But please try to listen to me when I say that I really am sorry and I really do regret everything that I ever did to hurt you. I really do love you, Harry. And I really don't want to do anything more that could hurt you. I just… want to know what I could do to stop making you hurt so much. You don't want to hear an 'I'm sorry' so I won't say it. But just know that I am truly honestly, sincerely sorry, Harry. There's nothing else in this world that I regret more than hurting you."

Author: It's really short. I know. But school's coming to an end and I have a lot of final projects to work on and such. I'll try to get more up once I have all of these problems out of the way. Thanks for reading. Reviews are always nice


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